Infectious Dangers
by NikkiSauce
Summary: I was suspicious about this event to begin with, but I didn't see any of this coming. I didn't think me, a somewhat harmless freelance journalist, would get pulled into this dangerous situation, with a couple of agents who happened to be suspected for the murder of Adam Benford, the president, and my parent's best friend. Oh yeah. My lucky day. Self-insert/OC. RE6.
1. Prologue

**Hey guys~ It's me again. /shot. **

**xD Okay okay. Sorry for the lack of updates on all my other stories. But I couldn't help myself! I got RE6 for my PS3 Wedensday, and I've been sucked in ever since. Not to mention my muse has been lagging in the other stories. But somehow said muse thought it would be funny to give me a huge plotbunny and this is what came out. Curse you muse. Curse. You.**

**Okay so yes this is a self-insert. And just to let you guys know I hardly EVER do them. I don't prefer them at all. But I thought about trying it. So yeah. And it's also in first person. Which is going to be seriously hard, because I usually write in third. So sorry if it seems...i don't know nasty? Is that the right word? **

**Quickly, I'd like to say that yes i've beaten Leon's campaign, but I don't remember much. So super sorry for any inaccuracy! I'm waiting for people to start doing Let's Play's on YT and to start the campaign again myself. Also! Before you guys start reviewing this story saying "Eww SI's suckk~ You suck~" or "SI/OC SEEMS SO MARY-SUE~ EWWW" like...chill. Give it a chance. SI Me isn't going to be Mary-sue. At ALL. Or at least I'll try to keep from it. And I'd like it if you guys didn't say this sucked because I'm actually writing this purely for fun. So there will be lots of haha funny moments. Hopefully. No need to say it sucks, because I probably will agree with you most the time. xD**

**And it will be pretty gore-y and detailed as much as I can get it. So if anyone is like...super weak stomached or sensitive I'm warning you. I'll try not to make it too bad! **

**Rating will probably change to M later. I don't know. We'll see.**

**Sorry for the length-y A/N xD! JUST READ THE PROLOGUE~ Chapter One is finished and should be up soon! **

**disclaimer: i do not own RE or Leon or Helena. i only own the SI/OC and anyone else that happens to pop up that aren't in the main storyline/game. ENJOY!**

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**prologue.**

Gasping for breath, I tried to move, but my legs gave away every time I tried. Opening my eyes, I met the sight of blur; a bright red color I could only assume was fire the only thing I could really make out. I coughed, not sure how, because it was still so hard to breathe. The smell of blood and the remnants of that dark blue haze that had swept through these streets hours before flooded into my nose. I was immediately hit with the memory of all the blood I'd smelt the day before in Tall Oaks. I winced. Didn't want to remember that. Didn't really want to remember any of this bullshit. I was still reeling from it all, not sure how I'd gotten myself into it.

Stomach churning, I held back the urge to vomit and waited a couple more seconds before I managed to push myself up onto all fours. A hand, warm and somehow comforting in this hell, wrapped around my exposed forearm. Glancing up, vision a little better; I locked eyes with those vivid gray-blue eyes. Those gray-blue eyes that had seen all this hell, experience all this hell with me, and then some.

"Can you stand?" he asked, with that deep, now scratch-y voice.

I nodded, even though I was sure it'd be hard. I couldn't exactly feel my legs, the bone shattering impact to the car hood after effects still shaking through me. I'd manage however. There was no doubt in my somehow still sane mind.

With a grin—how he'd pulled that off I wasn't sure, this man had been surprising me quite a lot recently— he stood, and I did the same. That's when I noticed the preying dead around us, and the woman my male counterpart was helping. Helena, I recognized. She wasn't looking very good at all. Summoning up my courage, I reached down to my holster and pulled out my .40 caliber handgun. I checked the clip, noticed I wasn't completely empty thank god, and slipped it back into the gun and readied myself.

Looking back at the man, I locked eyes with him yet again. "We should keep moving, Leon," I told him. My eyes drifted to the closing in enemies wearily. We were in a really bad position, which was really funny and stupid to say, because honestly it seemed like we _always_ were now-a-days.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Leon nod. "This way," he said, and started moving, supporting the barely coherent Helena. I followed, slow steps, eyes on those foes, and my hand tight around the handgun I aimed at the ground. They were slow, but I knew if I underestimated them, they wouldn't hesitate. I'd learned the hard way.

Maneuvering under the debris through the alleyway, I heard Leon and Helena fall to the ground, no thanks to the weak support of the wooden board they'd stepped on. I hurried to their side, helping Leon up—my hand may have stayed a little too long on his forearm, but hey who knows—and then helping him with Helena.

Cautiously leading now, I guided them through a door into a small, safe looking area, with an army hummer taking up most the space, where Leon thought it best to rest.

"Just leave me," I heard Helena murmur, and gritted my teeth.

Quickly, I turned to her, and shook my head, cutting Leon off from his own refusal. "What are you talking about, Helena? We're not giving up! You're not giving up! We've come too far to. Don't even ask that. Don't even ask that again!" My voice cracked and broke, I knew it. My body was shaking, trembling. I forced back those tears that had spilt too many times on this hell of a journey. I wasn't going to cry anymore.

Leon's eyes burned through me, but I didn't meet his gaze, feeling weak all of a sudden, my eyes planted firmly on my dirt caked boots.

The woman grunted, before smiling weakly. "You're right, Nikki. I'm sorry—" visible pain shot through Helena's body, and I hurried to her side with no second thoughts. She was badly injured and in need of medical attention.

Ingrid Hunnigan called at that exact moment, and Leon talked to her, telling her everything and then stating Helena needed medicine. After some more words, he hung up, and then started looking for some herbs, but not before looking to me, and I yet again refused to look at him back.

I heard glass shatter behind me, and realized he might have found something in the army hummer. I turned, just as Leon was unlocking the door and opening it.

And out fell the dead body of the male army man.

To which began to twitch, and then stand.

My blood boiled and my heart faltered, as Leon began to back up. I started to stand, gun cocked, ready to fire one of my remaining rounds—

Oh shit. I'm getting ahead of myself. Excuse me. How about we start off at the beginning? All the way back to that fateful night in that Ivy University office June twenty-ninth, twenty-thirteen.

All the way back to me, Nicole Butler, a harmless—maybe stretching the truth there—freelance journalist, witnessing Leon S. Kennedy, an operative of the Division of Security Operations, shoot Adam Benford, the President of the United States.

Adam Benford, my practically-Uncle.

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**fyi, practically-uncle doesn't mean they're blood-related. it basically just means she considers him an uncle due to family issues and such. may be stating the obvious sorry xD**

**review and such! thanks for reading! chapter one is on its way soon~ **


	2. One : Murder

**Hey again! Here's chapter one! **

**If anyone's worried about canon events being messed up, I PROMISE that won't happen! And if it does it won't be messed up too bad! Also this isn't LeonxHelena. But there might be slight AdaxLeon. Like slight-slight. Read in between the lines-gotta squint your eyes to see it. I kinda wanna do some SI/OCxLeon moments. Shameful SI/OCxLeon moments. So yeah. Might see some, though it won't be fast at all. This isn't exactly a romance/smut novel. xDD! Sorry! But there will be some! I'll try!**

**disclaimer: don't own RE or Leon or Helena. Just my SI/OC and Zoe Stewart/not her real last name [random let's-throw-my-best-friend-in-for-the-hell-of-it-to-provide-humor-and-proof-people-on-the-outside-are-flipping-their-shit-because-of-Tall-Oaks-chaos moments] and anyone else I toss in here that isn't from RE, and instead from my wonderful life. /shot.**

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**chapter one.**

"I don't exactly know, Zo. But I'm one of the only people he can trust, and he's practically family, I can't just say no to him," I said into the Bluetooth placed into my ear. My hands gripped the steering wheel, turning it ever so slightly as I entered the vicinity of Tall Oak's Ivy University.

Zoe Stewart, my best friend, let out a low, but audible, sigh. I knew this was bugging her, the fact that I'd left our state a million miles away to come to this event. This tense, sure to be the most shocking event in the States, next to the tragic incident in Raccoon City, which was now a mere memory. Well, at least until today. This afternoon to be exact.

"What does he think you can do, Nikki? You're not exactly working for any major newspapers. You're a _freelance journalist_," She replied finally. I could hear the irritation in her voice. It wasn't so much as irritation as it was worry. I knew her better than anyone, she was worried beyond belief.

"I think that's why. I know Adam; he's my step-father's best friend, one of his _only_ best friends. Adam knows I wouldn't corrupt this when I start writing it for newspapers and such. I won't sugar coat the truth, and I won't lie and throw things into the story that weren't said at this event. Not like the other reporters who are sure to be there. I just…I have to do this. I owe it to him." My throat was starting to dry up now as I remembered the phone call I'd received directly from the President himself. I remembered the conversation like it was yesterday. I remembered every word, and every emotion that was relayed through those words as he spoke them. Adam Benford was going through with this, his country needed to know the truth, and he wasn't going to stop, no matter what anyone did or said.

I pulled into the underground parking lot, and grabbed my gray colored shoulder bag. I didn't really pay attention to see if there was anyone else heading to where I was. I was too busy digging inside my bag. I pulled out the necklace with my ID and clearance for this event. Clearance to go up directly to where the President was waiting to discuss with him how he wanted to go about the story I'd sell to the most trusted newspaper—who I know wouldn't destroy it— I knew to relay this historical event.

Opening my car door, I stepped out and closed it. Zoe's breathing was the only thing I could hear on her line. She was thinking of what to say, or possibly just thinking in general. Her mind never stopped. Locking my car, I started towards the elevator and entered it.

"Just be careful, Nikki. I have a bad feeling about this," my best friend finally spoke. Now the worry had completely consumed the irritation. I let out a sigh, and smiled.

"I will. I promise I will call you as soon as this is all over. Okay? Just paint your nails and eat some gingersnaps. Watch the broadcast on TV. Who knows, maybe you'll see the back of my head. The back of my sexy head," I teased. Laughter, a little strained sounding but laughter none the less, echoed through my Bluetooth.

"Oh please, baby. You _know_ I'll be looking for that pretty little head of yours. I expect to see it in the front row too. Nothing less," she teased right back.

With quick farewells, we both hung up, and I already missed her. I'd been in Tall Oaks for at least two days, staying in a hotel close to the university. Thanks to Adam, I'd gotten a pretty decent one and a pretty decent room. It had been reserved weeks in advance, because we were both sure all the hotels would be completely full thanks to this, and we'd been right, naturally.

Glancing up, I watched the dots atop light up, moving at a slow pace. I began to fix my outfit which wasn't very business-like, but I didn't think it really mattered. A dark brown sleeveless pull over, about mid chest long, covered little of my crisp white button-down, tucked loosely into my favorite pair of dark blue sailor shorts pulled kind of high up on my hips. Tan laced up boots hugged my feet superbly. My long, platinum blond hair was let down from its usual bun fashion and a white knitted hat sat pulled loosely on my head. I looked kind of like a hipster, I realized with a blink of my eyes. I quickly soured, thinking that maybe I should have put some more effort into dressing for these kinds of things.

I bit back a laugh. How could I have possibly known how to dress? I'd never actually done this before. And I was twenty-three, what did I care what any of the other reporters or government officials thought? Shaking my head, I heard the elevator ding and its doors slide open. Stepping out, I took in the nice appearance of the hallway that had welcomed me. It was really nice, a place I really didn't think I belonged in. Rich people probably attended this university or something like that. I'd been lucky, scholarships and grants had been hard to come by but I'd gotten most of the ones I'd needed for my college, my college was mediocre compared to Ivy.

Walking down the hall, I exited it into a room with books under thick glass, apparently important. I stopped in there to check my bag for my essentials. I wanted to be prepared when the speech was given. Inside, several spiral notebooks took up most of the space, along with several ink pens, and then my cell phone and lastly my trademark pocketknife. I bit my lip a little, as my fingers glided over it. I knew it was pretty bad, maybe even a federal offense to bring a knife into this, and I was sure I'd get into deep shit if anyone found it, but I'd grown up always being prepared for anything, and honestly I wasn't going to stray from that. Taking it out carefully, I slipped it into my right boot, hoping it would be safe and concealed there.

I didn't dwell long, wanting to continue onward, which lead me through another door into the reception hall. I had to stop to awe at the beauty of it. Lots of balloons and long tables with chairs filled the vast space. Would I be eating here with them? I didn't think so, but knowing Adam he'd insist I should.

My own thoughts were cut off by a strange feeling inside my gut. It was one of those pulls, one of those forceful tugs, I got when I started getting bad vibes. Zoe liked to call it my sixth sense, but I denied it. I'd been proven wrong many on account of them, but this time…

This time it felt way different. Hurried now, I walked up a huge flight of steps to the oak door. My hand froze on the door handle, but I mustered up my courage and pushed on. I opened the door silently and slowly, eased my small frame in and then close it back. The room was pretty decent sized, with some balloons, a table, and some plants. Down the hall, I heard voices, voice that didn't sound at all familiar. I gulped. What if someone had come to Adam's office to stop him from telling the truth about Raccoon City? What if someone had come to Adam's office to kill him? That was ridiculous to think, but I was a pretty ridiculous person.

I was tip toeing at this point towards that door where those voices were coming from. I noticed the door was open now, and that a light illuminated from inside it, casting shadows on the floor and wall adjacent to it in the hall.

"Don't make me do this," I heard. It was a male's voice.

My breathing was shallow, my heartbeat however deafening. I swore whoever was in the room could possibly hear it, it was that loud. A couple more steps and I was closer to the threshold. Closer and Closer.

Until finally I swung myself into the doorway, right when that same male voice bellowed, "ADAM!"

And the next thing I see is my beloved Uncle, my step-father's and mother's best friend, being shot in the head, watching as his head practically exploded as the bullet cut through flesh and brain tissue, and then his body collapse to the ground by the force, and finally his blood pooling around his dead corpse.

I heard an ear splitting scream, before I recognized it was my own. I'd never screamed that loud in my life or at least I can't remember ever doing so. My body acted on its own, and I rocketed into the room, sliding onto the hardwood floor to my Uncle's side, ignoring the blood that was around him, the blood that was slowly covering my exposed legs. My shaking hands reached out to take a hold of the caking fabric on his chest. Tears blurred my vision, and splashed onto my cheeks.

"Uncle Adam…Oh my god. Please. Please. _Please_ let this be a horrible nightmare. Uncle Adam please get up! Oh my god this can't be! This can't _be_!" I pulled my hands back, clutching my own chest, and I rocked back and forth, half sobbing, half screaming Adam's name. Begging and pleading like no other for this to be just a dream, a horrible nightmare. Begging and pleading that someone wake me up from it all.

"Oh my god," a female's voice came from behind me.

I felt someone's hands on me, and I freaked, reaching into my boot for my pocketknife. I flipped it out, jumping to my feet and turning to confront the person who dared to lay a hand on me.

It was the male. The owner of the voice. Tall, blonde, and—can't believe I thought this in the middle of this horrible chaos—handsome.

My heart crashed into my ribcage, wanting to rip itself from the confides of my chest and flee from it all. I willed it to stop at once, trying to rein it in and control it. It wanted out, and…and in a split second it stopped as my glossy orbs caught what the man had in his hand.

My heart burst into a fiery rage, burning more intense than ever before. Burning with complete and utter hate.

"You," I muttered my gripped on my knife steadying. "You did this."

He said nothing to defend his case, but I noticed a small flicker of remorse in his eyes, and my heart roared. How dare he show remorse after killing Adam. How dare he.

I was crying no longer, the tears I had been crying before slowly drying up. The heat of the flame extinguished them. My breathing was still rapid, and hard to control.

Before I could spout out any kind of hateful slur of words—probably more curse words than actual word-words—the other person in the room, the female, stepped towards me. I didn't lower the knife, and didn't move it either. It stayed pointed firmly at the man. However, I was quickly assumed she was with the male, since she wasn't doing anything to detain him for killing—no _murdering_ Adam. I was cornered.

"Please lower the knife, Miss," the brunette woman requested, to which I answered with a short shake of my head. Not on my life, would I do such a thing. She was crazy.

"Okay…you don't have to. Just…can you tell us who you are? And allow us to explain this all to you?"

"Explain? Explain _what_? He _murdered_ my Uncle. Our President. What is there to explain?" I growled, turning my gaze back to the man in time to see him flinch a bit. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. What…?

The brunette took another step, and shook her head. "Look at him again. Look for us please."

Confusion washed away into suspicion. Was she trying to catch me off guard? I wasn't stupid. She couldn't fool me. And yet…I couldn't help but wonder. My vision had been pretty blurry when I'd rush to Adam's side. I assumed straight away it was him, since this was the exact office he'd be protected in before the reception. And the ridiculous thoughts fueled my emotions. I decided to do it. Lowering the knife a bit, I looked over my shoulder, and saw a severely decayed Adam.

I dropped my arm down, grip on the knife significantly loose, and turned fully to look at him. He was Adam that was sure, but it didn't _look_ like him. Didn't look like the Adam I'd known since I was eight. Didn't look like the Adam who'd been introduced to me when I was younger and who had helped me color drawings at the kitchen table in my parent's old house.

"What…what happened to him," I asked, turning to look at the woman. I didn't understand what was going. I didn't understand at all.

"The President—Your Uncle from what I understand was infected. He…he was turned into a zombie," she explained wearily. "Leon…the man you pointed your knife at…he shot the President, because he was going to attack me. He saved my life."

"L-Leon…?"

_"I'll be in the office on the right. Just go up the flight of stairs in the reception hall and enter through the doors and the hall should just take you right there, Nikki," Adam told me on the phone. He sounded extremely tired, and I shouldn't have been surprised, he was the President after all._

_"Alright. I got it. Is there anyone else going to be in the room? I don't want to just walk in there imposing on anything, Uncle," I questioned._

_Adam Benford laughed. "Just a good friend of mine, who is also an Agent in my organization, named __Leon__. As well as a secret service agent. Nothing to worry about, my dear."_

_"You know how I am though…"_

_"Always cautious. Nikki, these days one can never be overly cautious. Never."_

"Uncle told me…about you. Well…just your name and that you're a good friend of his," I muttered, turning to lock eyes with this 'Leon'. "I…I'm Nicole Butler."

A spark of recognition flashed in both people's eyes, but the sound of ringing cut any questions off. Leon reached to pull out his phone, but the brunette had her's out faster. She answered it and Leon took her side. The voice talking to them belonged to a female, and she sounded utterly frantic.

My interest in the conversation depleted as I bent down to put my pocket knife away and to look at Adam further. I couldn't believe this had happened. Zombie? He was a zombie? Zombies weren't real. They were made up. They were fictional. Reaching out, the texture of his skin on his face was quite disgusting. It felt like a rotten apple, the mush-y, squish-y like texture. I was sure if I dug into it, my fingers would slip in. A cold shiver ran down my spine. Now that was disgusting. I wouldn't desecrate my Uncle's body in such a way. It was already desecrated enough.

As I looked him over, I started to wonder if he was a zombie, did all zombies look like this. There had been plenty zombie movies as well as novels. Everyone had different views of the undead creatures, I was sure. Did they all look like this? Flesh rotting right off the bone, threatening to collapse into itself like a bad lung. And what about that putrid smell radiating off their nasty body?

Before I could stop myself, or even be repulsed, I was caressing that delicate corroded skin. Adam Benford, the President of the United States, my Uncle. Gone. Dead. He wasn't going to come back. The brain matter and blood on the floor told me so.

_He used to be those things. He's not anymore. He was a zombie for no more than ten seconds. Now he's dead. Dead and gone._

Someone cleared their throat, bringing me back to reality. I stood, wiping away any trace of emotion on my face and evidence of my Uncle's gross juices on my fingers onto my shorts, and looked to the two agents. The brunette held out the phone and I took a hold of it, raising an eyebrow.

"Nicole Butler?" the woman on the screen asked.

"This is she. And you are?"

"Ingrid Hunnigan. Miss Nicole, you're not blood related to the President, but he considered you family, therefore we need to get you out of there safely—"

"If I wasn't you'd just leave me here? Is that what I'm getting?" It may have been rude to ask that, but in the current situation I really didn't give a damn.

Ingrid looked like a fish out of water.

A sharp 'no' came from Leon's mouth. I looked at him. "No we wouldn't. Even if you weren't," he quickly elaborated. I hummed. Interesting.

"Anyways," Ingrid said, composing herself. "Go with Agent Kennedy and Agent Harper. They'll get you out safely, and as they seem to have a lead, I'd appreciate it if you keep me up to date. I leave it to you Agents. Miss Nicole please stick with them. Good luck."

I handed back the phone to the brunette, Helena Harper apparently, and raised both my eyebrows. "Well…what is this _lead_ we have?"

"Us. Not you," Leon corrected, and then looked to Helena. "You said the Cathedral?"

"Yes. Everything will be explained there."

"You're going to tell me everything once we get there. Deal?"

Was it just me, or did Leon not look like he trusted Helena? Quite hilarious, because if anyone didn't trust anyone in this little group, it was me trusting neither one of them, no matter how much my Uncle may have liked them.

"Deal."

As they began to walk out, I gave a final look at Adam's body, before hurrying to catch up.

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**don't like the ending but oh well. and sorry if it all seems so bland. i'm trying! review and such! thanks for reading! **


	3. Two : Search

**Wooo~ I'm pretty proud of myself. Writing like crazy! Good news, found a decent Let's Play/Walkthrough to use to help keep this all accurate as possible! And I started Leon's campaign again~ Oh joy!**

**I wanna thank everyone for the follows! As well as the favorite and even the reviews! Thank you so, so, SO much! You have no clue how happy they made me! And made me want to proofread even more and get to writing Chapter 3! So yeah. Motivation via reviews/follows/faves works. But right now I'm in that stage where I'm just like "writewritewritewrite" regardless. They make me happy nonetheless. ;u;**

**SI/OC is...kind of a bitch. Which by the way I should state, the language in this is pretty bad. And probably will continue to be. So if you're sensitive. She's a big potty mouth. Yeah. Anyways, she's kind of a bitch in this chapter, but she won't be for long! But I mean...she does have a good reason to be. At least in my opinion.**

**But I digress. **

**ENJOY. REVIEW = LOVE. YADAYADAYADA.**

**disclaimer: i don't own RE. Not Helena. And _sadly_ not Leon. Just my SI/OC and anyone I toss in at random! Enjoy!**

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**chapter two.**

So, let's just say I didn't exactly feel very welcome. (I shouldn't be complaining, it's not like I _want _to be welcome) After witnessing Leon Kennedy shoot my Uncle, and being told by some woman named Ingrid Hunnigan that I _had _to go with the two agents on their mission to uncover the truth at some Cathedral, I'd walked about a couple of feet, walked into a half open door in the same hallway where the President's office was, and managed to scare the shit out of myself. I mean, how was I supposed to know the guy in the chair was dead? And how was I supposed to know that we were supposed to be 'incognito', as in no screaming at all? As soon as the dead guy fell to the floor out of that chair, I screamed and I swear I almost pissed myself. What? Seriously. Leon and Helena had to literally grab me and drag me out of that room. I was frozen solid. Honestly you couldn't blame a girl.

Leon stopped us before opening the door. He spoke directly to Helena, both of them ready to fly through the door and shoot someone. "If you see one of 'em, aim for the head. It's your best bet."

Heading through the door—dramatically might I add—, Leon and Helena did a sweep, checking for any hostiles, while I eyed the reception below. I must have had a sad expression on my face, because Leon put a hand on my shoulder, giving it a soft reassuring squeeze. I brushed him off, not too nicely, refusing to look at him. I was still hurting from what I'd seen. What he had done just a couple minutes ago. Composing myself once again into that emotionless façade, I listened to the agents speak.

"This was where the reception was going to be. They'd all be here eating dinner right now if…" The guilt in Leon's voice was unmistakable, and I felt my heart clench tightly. The burning fire of hatred was still there, but I knew it was significantly lessening the more I heard Leon speak of earlier or even a hint about it, the more I heard Leon's regret and anguish. I'd only heard him speak of it about two times, but those two times were enough to make my heart break. I didn't understand it either, normally it was easier to control, my emotions and thoughts, my façade, but here and now it seemed so much more difficult. I felt myself slipping up way too many times to count.

"You think anyone survived?" Helena, I was starting to see that she was the more hopeful, emotional agent.

"I hope so."

We continued on, Leon leading the way, Helena behind me, putting me between the two of them.

"I can't believe this is happening. It's just like Raccoon," the male said, far away sounding. My eyebrows shot up at this, but I remained silent. I had no reason to speak.

"The Raccoon City incident," the brunette muttered behind me. "You were one of the survivors."

Survivors? There had been survivors? My mind raced, trying to recall if Adam had spoken to my step-father about anything of the sort. Nothing came up; however, I was sure there was something there.

"Yeah…I'll never forget it."

_No doubt. I don't think anyone would— _

Leon's next words caused me to tense up. Anger spreading through me. My blood boiled.

"We're going to this Cathedral of yours. But if you really had a hand in this, you can kiss your freedom goodbye."

He seriously had the audacity to say that.

I couldn't stop the sarcastic laugh that slipped from my tightly pursed lips. Both agents stopped, but I kept walking, passing Leon right by. "Maybe you shouldn't be saying that and sounding all high and mighty," I said, before turning to look at him. "After all, you shot the President. No matter if he was a zombie or not. You're in just as much shit as she is. And without proof that he _was _a zombie well…as far as I know…freedom is but a mere distant memory for both of you." I laced every word with the precise amount of venom. My tone was ever so condescending.

I wasn't always this way. In fact, I was rather polite and kind. It wasn't a very good day though, and these people had rubbed me the wrong way. I didn't plan on respecting them at all. I didn't plan on being sympathetic, because I was hurt, and human nature played a bigger picture, making it seem just fine to be hurting someone else just as much, if not more, as they had hurt you.

So what if it made me look like a bully.

I didn't actually _care_.

Turning away, I walked down the remaining flight of stairs, and heard Helena murmur a simple and short 'I know', before they began moving once again. My eyes glanced over the hall before loud footsteps were heard from way far in the back. I didn't wait, adrenaline suddenly coursing through me, and raced past two long tables, both having chairs litter the walkways making it impossible to get through, and managed to get through the walkway between tables two and three. Leon and Helena called my name, but my body protested, and raced through tables one and two, zig-zagging through the chairs blocking my path and down yet another pair of tables.

I slid to a halt, staring straight at the door to the kitchen, I assumed. The agents were at my side in a minute. Feeling eyes on me, I looked to my left.

Leon looked pissed, giving me this look that seemed to say 'you're-becoming-troublesome-so-stay-put-and-stop-or-this-is-going-to-get-ugly'. Challenge accepted.

"Don't run off like that again," he ordered.

I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "Yeah. Sure."

The male ignored that, hurrying towards the doorway. We followed, and I jumped when pots and pans crashed to the floor.

"Shit! What the hell," I exclaimed, and was shoved quickly behind Helena.

_Getting tired of being **shoved**!_

"In the back!"

I barely had time the catch up to the racing agents. We sped through the kitchen and then down a corridor into the back of it where once again I almost pissed myself, because a trashcan fell over on its own. In the door on the right, down the end of the hall, distinctive sounds of a man coughing could be heard. My mouth was drying up, and my heart was racing faster than ever before. With a slight moment of hesitation, both agents burst into the room, guns pointed to start unloading some rounds.

I wasn't sure what I was expecting, in fact, I'm pretty sure none of us were sure. Seeing an actual man allowed me to release the breath I'd been holding in. Not a zombie. Thank god.

"Wait! Don't shoot," he begged, and then exploded into a fit of harsh sounding coughs. I bit my lip, starting to move towards him as Leon asked if he was alright.

When he finally stopped coughing, the man looked up. "The fog…'

My eyebrows knitted, and I looked to Helena who was questioning my own thoughts out loud.

"The fog…it came out of nowhere," he elaborated, but I still didn't understand. What fog? There hadn't been any fog when I'd got here. Could it have swept in when I'd gotten inside? But how? How could it have so fast? Shaking my head, my body grew rock solid as sounds came from somewhere far behind us. An inhuman roar and then a female's scream.

The man promptly flipped his shit, yelling 'Liz', and then trying to take off after the sound. Leon attempted to hold him back. "Wait," he grunted. "It's too dangerous." The distressed man broke free however.

Glancing down, I noticed he'd dropped something, and I picked it up carefully. A picture of a girl lit up the screen. She was pretty, smiling with brown locks pulled back into a tight braid. The man was back in an instant, taking it from me and then saying, "My daughter…she's all alone! If we don't do something—"

Leon's hand clasping firmly over his mouth, cut him off. I felt a little bad, because I was thankful for him doing that. To be honest the man was freaking me out. I was already on the edge, but he was making it worse and worse by the minute.

"Alright, I get it," Leon said. "But if you don't keep it down you won't live to save her. You understand?"

The man answered with a nod, and I moved to stand close to him. He didn't seem to notice, glancing down at the picture of his daughter. It looked like he was mourning her possible death already, but maybe that was just me. I reach out to grab his shoulder, to show him that we cared, that I cared, and that we'd find her, but I hesitated, and dropped my arm back to my side. I couldn't. I didn't know why, but I just couldn't assure him those things. Maybe because I was waiting for someone to do it for me. Maybe because I was waiting for my Uncle's killer to finally get fed up with my bitch-yness and yell at me that he was sorry, that there was nothing he could do, that he was so, so sorry. I didn't think that would happen—

Wait. What was I thinking!?

_Shut up, Nikki. There's no way in hell you want him to do that. You don't care. You don't care how bad he feels. Just shut up and keep moving._

"Nicole?"

Startled, I looked at Helena who was waiting for me to follow. With a nod, I hurried along and made it to the man's side as we entered the kitchen, listening to the sounds of shattering glass and rustling objects that sounded so far away. The lights were out, and I narrowed my eyes trying to see. Thankfully, Leon's light, a tiny little flashlight in his ear, lit up enough for me to see. Through the reception tables, lightning flashed and thunder rolled. The atmosphere was so tense; it caused the hair on my skin to stand.

"I hate this," I found myself saying. My body shook a little. I'd never been in a situation like this before, but I knew I'd always hate it. I was silently wishing I was somewhere else. Preferably back in the apartment Zoe and I shared. Eating frozen pizza and watching the funny TV shows. Letting myself enjoy that alternate reality, I barely noticed the chandelier fall from the ceiling and crash, blocking the way to the stairs. I assume I'd been way to close to it, heading in that direction for some unknown reason, and it caused Leon to grab and me and pull me into him. Puzzled, I blinked and looked up at the man.

"Be careful," he told me, before letting me go and moving away, closer to the once beautiful object. "That's quite a draft."

"I don't think it was a draft." Reaching out, I gripped the end of his leather jacket, and gulped hard. My eyes were wide, staring at the burning part of the chandelier. I no longer tried to hide my fear. It was much harder to, and not worth the effort.

"We have to find her," the man said, moving to the door.

"We will. Just stay close," Leon assured him, and then glanced down to my hand. I jerked back, letting go of it like I'd been stung by a bee, suddenly realizing what I'd been holding on to, and whom.

"Thank you," was the last thing the man uttered before we entered even more tense territory.

* * *

"Your daughter…Liz was it? Can I see the picture again?" We were in the room with the books under glass. The man had yet again broken into his typical coughing fit.

Now a little better, he nodded and handed me it. My gaze traveled over it one last time before I handed it back.

"Liz is a really pretty name. It suits her." I smiled. It was weak and a bit strained, but the look on the man's face, the bright happy look that engulfed it, was worth it all. I was putting forth effort to make him feel better, at least take his mind off the emanate possibility that his daughter may not even be here anymore, and that female scream we heard earlier could be someone else's. Or worse…she was dead.

"You think so?" He seemed so happy, it was contagious, and I found myself smiling genuinely.

"Yeah! I wouldn't lie about names. I _am _a girl after all." I laughed. "I can't wait to meet her."

We carried on; passing by the elevator I'd used to get up onto this floor. It was—no surprise there—powerless, like the rest of the building. Luckily, the man worked here and had the keys. He also had a car in the underground parking lot. I didn't say I had one too. Something told me that even if we had the car, either one of them; it wouldn't help our situation, whatever our situation _was_. It was still a mystery to me. All I knew was we were going to the Tall Oaks Cathedral. How we were getting there was as much a mystery as where it was to me.

The man pushed a piece of debris out of the way, and we rounded a corner, only to find yet another long hallway for us to walk down. I kept quiet, not wanting to complain.

The door we were heading to was the last door after another turn, near the end of the hallway, yet that wasn't the thing I was most focused on. It was the thing _on _it. Bloody handprints. Smudged a bit. Still fresh. My skin crawled. I wasn't very religious, but I found myself praying. Praying that what ever was beyond that door, it wouldn't be bad, or at least not that bad. Something Leon and Helena—no _we_ could handle. I wasn't going to stand back and be useless, no matter what they said or how scared I felt.

Leon opened the door cautiously, ever so slowly and both their guns were up in no time. Slow steps inward. Slow, deathly slow.

And then someone jumped into view. She was covered in blood, holding her side like she was injured, and fell to the floor.

"Liz!"

I grunted as the man rushed passed me to the girl's side.

This was his daughter? This was the girl I'd seen—we'd seen in that picture? I couldn't believe it. Eyes sweeping around the room, I took in the blood stains on the floor, and the other two bodies, one lying on top of the other.

My throat closed up and I found myself looking at Leon. He met my blue-green orbs with his gray-blue ones and took my hand in his, giving it a squeeze, a harder squeeze than the one he'd given my shoulder before, and pulled me towards him. This time I didn't pull away. I didn't protest. I didn't argue. I didn't do anything. I couldn't. I was an icicle, frozen, cold, and shivering.

"This time do what I say. Stay behind me."

I made no move to protest. I didn't say a word.


	4. Three : Break

**8D I COME BEARING AN UPDATE. /bows.**

**Ahhhh so happy~ I seriously am! Thank you guys once _again_! You know, I actually had no clue this story would be popular. Or should I say liked. I didn't expect it at all! I'm still iffy about this first person writing, and sometimes I feel like it's really dry or bland. Repetitive might be the better word. But you guys seem to like it! So I guess I'm doing something right xD! So thank you guys for the faves, follows, and reviews. And to the favers and followers, I'd love to hear what you guys think! I don't bite by any means, so don't be scared! **

**I should however say I don't appreciate flames. So please don't deliever them. I'll be pretty sad. And a sad Nikki isn't a good Nikki. **

**Also should say that this story is just a big ball of spoilers. So SPOILER ALERT. I assume you guys know this. The description kinda speaks for itself. I guess ._.**

**AHHH. AND I SHOULD SAY. THERE IS A SI/OC X LEON MOMENT. It's not that big. Really. And considering Leon's personality, the moment doesn't seem farfetched (at least not to me). He's quite known for being that comforting protector. Especially with the people he's suppose to take care of. So yeah. ENJOY THAT. SI/OC WILL BE BACK TO HER BITCHY SELF SHORTLY xD!**

**Okay so yeah. Enough of my rambling. Read and enjoy! Reviews make me roll around on the floor and flail uncontrollable. Which is good. Just saying.**

**disclaimer: i do not own Helena or Leon or RE. Just my SI/OC and anyone I kick in at random!**

* * *

**chapter three. **

My hands clenched and unclenched the back of Leon's jacket. I pressed myself into the back of the elevator, trying to block it out. Block out the loud sobbing coming from the man on the floor, mourning the sudden death of his daughter Liz. We'd made it through that hallway and into the elevator just a few minutes ago. She was fine one second, and then doubling over coughing and…

And she just died.

Leon backed up, making sure I was completely concealed behind his tall frame. I leaned my forehead against his back, trying to control my breathing and steady my heart.

It all grew worse when the lights began to flicker, and we were swallowed up in darkness, so thick I couldn't see inches in front of me. I was about to start hyperventilating. The man's coughing stopped short, and the sound of flesh squishing and then ripping clean off the bone replaced it.

Some light lit up the small area, from Leon's flashlight.

What I saw made me wish I was still in the dark.

"Oh my god," I whispered, finding my voice. My legs turned to jelly, and I had to grip Leon's jacket harder to keep from falling to the floor.

A disgusting, teeth baring Liz jumped onto Leon, and I dove to the ground, not wanting to be behind him, just as he threw her off him. Unfortunately that was a seriously stupid ass move on my part, I was vulnerable there, and when he'd thrown her it had caused her to see me trying to hide in the far corner of the elevator. She took off after me, roaring at the top of her lungs, her arms outstretched towards me, ready to snatch me up and—

Screw _that_. That wasn't happening.

"Fuck. OFF," I roared, pulling back my right leg and then thrusting it forward. The heel of my boot dug into her face, and I swore I heard bone break. Due to the force of my foot slamming into her face, she was thrown backwards, momentarily disorientated.

A moment was all that was needed.

Helena acted quickly, throwing Liz down, holding her still, and then shooting her in the head. Liz went slack, blood pouring onto the floor around her. I scrambled to my feet, hands groping for help. Leon was there almost instantaneously, grabbing a hold on my wrists, helping me up. I found myself huddling close to him, for some reason needing some comfort and protection. I'd probably regret it later, call myself stupid and maybe slap myself, nevertheless it didn't matter right then. I wasn't in my right mind after all.

Moans and groans flooded my ears. I couldn't breathe at this point. We weren't alone in here. We weren't _alone _in _here_.

"Helena grab your gun," Leon ordered, forcing me yet again behind him. "Nicole when the elevator opens and we clear the way enough, make a run for it." He looked at me over his shoulder. "Nicole—"

"I get it. I will." I wasn't completely out of my right mind at least. Still all for kicking Leon in the face when he wanted to speak—I mean cutting him off when he was speaking. Haha…ha.

The next couple of seconds felt like eternity. And maybe I shouldn't have wished it would go by faster, because when those elevator doors open, it was like the gates of hell opening up.

"Shit! Don't let'em in!"

I stifled a scream as zombies infiltrated the already cramped space. Leon and Helena shot of rounds relentlessly. Not used to it, my eardrums seemed like they were going to bust.

"Go Nicole," Helena bellowed. How I managed to hear, I wasn't sure. I didn't waste the opening though and shot out, tearing through the hostiles like a bat out of hell.

My legs were no longer jelly-like, instead sheer power rushed through them. The need to escape, to get away overtaking my entire body. My legs, the deliverers, the things that would take me, guide me; lead me to that promise land, that paradise away from here. Far away from here.

It was short lived. My foot caught onto something, causing me to crash to the pavement none to nicely. I gasped, body now aching all over. One of the cars in the parking lot started to blare its alarm, signaling bad news for us, it surely would attract unwanted attention.

Struggling to get up and move, I flipped myself over onto my back, ignoring the fierce burning on my chin and knees. Road rash, I assumed. Someone shouted my name, telling me to move, to get up and run. They didn't understand that I _couldn't_. It was all of a sudden the hardest thing to do. Because my eyes landed on the thing I'd tripped over. Because my eyes saw the undead thing crawling towards me, eager to rip its teeth into my flesh.

It was going to eat me. It was going to eat me alive. I would turn into them. I would turn into one of them. I couldn't allow that. I couldn't bare the thought. No. Never. Never ever.

I started to push myself back, using the heels of my boots and the balls of my hands. Further and further away. Back and back. Until my back connected with something. That something being a pair of gross zombie legs. I reared back my head, hearing the distinctive sound of bones dislodging from their sockets—or I just thought that's what it was. The zombie let out a shriek and fell to the pavement, giving me that small chance to crawl on all fours away onto my feet finally.

Doing a quick sweep of my surroundings, I noticed Helena and Leon hurrying to join me. The male agent raced right by me, grabbing my arm in the process, and yelling that we should get out of here. Neither of us protested in the slightest, tailing behind him to a door in the back, to which he busted into.

Inside, computers took up a corner, and I quickly realized they weren't just any computers, but feeding live video from surveillance cameras around the University. We drifted over to them.

I saw them before they did, my eyes pulling straight away to the screen. People. Two of them yelling inaudibly, one waving a sign that read 'Help'. I reached out, my fingertips grazing the cold, flat surface. Help them. That's all they wanted. Help. I wanted to help them. Maybe if I could just reach through the screen, I could pull them here. Save them. Save them both. And I knew it was too late. They were so far gone.

At my side, Leon slid a new clip into his gun and then pulling back the top of it, chambering a new round. "Let's go," he commanded, before turning away and starting to leave.

Go where? Help them?

"Leon, it's too late," Helena said.

It was. Zombies were coming up from behind the students. And then…

Gasping, I turned away swiftly, tears forming in my eyes. Helena reached out to consul me, but I wouldn't let her, breathing out a 'no' and telling her to 'leave me alone', and moved to the other side of the room, amongst the clutter of objects I could careless about.

Weak. Weak and powerless. That's exactly how I felt. My hands were shaking again. My legs were quaking. My eyes flooded with not—completely—tears of sorrow, but frustration and annoyance. At Leon. At Helena. At the fact that nothing had been done to save Adam. That there was nothing that _could _have been done.

Annoyed with _myself_.

"I need a minute. I know we don't have time, but I just need to get myself situated," I told them, knowing they were watching me intently.

"We'll be waiting just outside then," Helena responded. Her tone held a slight edge of suspicion. Did she think I was going to bolt on them? Like I would. It wasn't like I had anywhere _to _go. I sure as hell wasn't going back to the parking lot.

I waited, listening to their retreating footsteps and the door close behind them, before I let myself slip, falling to my knees crying. I screamed. I punched the floor. I screamed some more. I threw things, anything I could find, ripped a screen away from the others and tossed it clean across the room.

When I went to do the same with another, arms wrapped around my waist, drawing me away and into their rock hard chest. I kicked and I screamed, flailing my arms like a mad woman, and then finally just gave up, going limp. They dropped to their knees, and I just followed, sobbing like a child. They turned me, and I saw who it was.

Leon.

Leon Kennedy.

Agent Kennedy.

"I'm sorry." It was all he said. And I knew he was. I could see it in his eyes, in the expression on his face, in the actions he did. Holding me to him. Rubbing my arms and back.

I hadn't really noticed how different we were in physical appearance—couldn't say anything about mental or emotional differences; I didn't know him that well yet. He was a big man, not in weight, just tall, and not in the bulky sense, but I knew he had muscles beneath those cloths. I was so tiny, so delicate and fragile looking. Next to one another, I was certain people could see it.

I knew I needed to say something. Sorry. Tell him it was okay. _Something_.

I didn't, merely leaned into him, my forehead resting against his chest, letting myself cry for a little longer, enjoying the comfort he seemed to offer so willingly, and then I pulled away entirely, removing myself from him, thinking it was the right thing to do, the only thing _to _do.

Yet somewhere within the confides of my heart, some rogue part started to ache, wishing to have it all back, to be back in his arms, to let him care for me for just a while longer. And it felt so _weird_, because I had never felt that for anyone, never had anyone who made me want to stay in such an intimate position.

At least not a man and not someone I'd known for only a good half hour or so.

Naturally, I just chalked it up to be a random, spur of the moment thing. It couldn't be real. Not real at all. A figment of my silly imagination.

"You okay?"

Both of us standing now, I nodded and wiped the remaining tears away with my sleeve.

"Still need a few more seconds. I-If you don't mind," I whispered, scared my voice would crack or break if I got any louder.

Leon nodded, before leaving out.

I didn't stay turned in the direction he'd left to see if he'd stopped or looked at me, just listened to hear if the door shut.

It did, and I found myself trying to fix myself. Fix the mess that was Nicole Butler.

My pull over was only slightly shredded from the fall, but somewhere in my mind I thought that the less I had on the faster my pretty little shaven legs could take me, so I removed it and tossed it away. Surprisingly, I still had my shoulder bag, and even my ID. I ripped the that off, not wanting anything to remind me of this day later on, so it joined the same spot where my pull over was. My hat was still on my head, shockingly, and I decided to just keep it. I liked it after all. Afterwards, I checked the inside on my bag. Everything seemed to be there, thankfully, however when I reached up to check if my Bluetooth was still there, it was no where to be found, which seemed to explain the sudden weightless feeling. It probably fell back in the parking lot, more than likely when I'd tripped over the zombie.

Cell phone now in my hand, I wondered if I should call Zoe. Was she still worrying? I didn't want her to. Not about me. She had so much more to worry about. So many family issues. It bothered me that I just added to it all.

_I should call her. I really want to. I really…really need to hear her voice. I need to tell her what's going on. I need to tell her. Shit. I wish she was here. No…No I don't. I couldn't possible ask for such a horrible thing. She'd be as useless as I am now. I wouldn't want her to go through this. This…this hell. _

Before I could decide, my screen lit up, rang, and showed Zoe's picture. She was calling me. She was _calling me_.

How did she do that? Read my mind from so far away. It was crazy.

Back to trying to figure out if I should answer it, I staring at the screen for a few more seconds, until I discovered the answer to the dilemma and hit end, screening her call. I couldn't bring her into this. Not right now. Not just yet. Sliding it into my pocket, I removed my shoulder bag and tossed it. No need for _that _anymore. I didn't think I'd be writing or taking notes to write about the misadventure of a freelance journalist who was shoved into a crazy, dangerous event involving two agents, one of them guilty for killing the President of the United States who just happened to turned into a zombie, and the other blaming the whole outbreak of Tall Oaks on herself.

Wouldn't that be the best fucking story ever?

Who knows, maybe I'd be added to the New York Times bestseller's list.

Haha.

Mentally, I'm sure I wasn't going to fix anytime soon, so I just sticked with my physical appearance. My usual front would make up for it. Hopefully.

Fixed as much as I could be, I started for the door and opened it revealing Leon and Helena waiting right outside. I offered them a smile, and then dropped it when Leon held something out to me.

One of his guns. Just like his other.

"Wha—?"

"You know how to use one?"

My eyes narrowed. "My step-father was in the military with Uncle Adam. He taught me everything he knew," I huffed. "So yes. I do. Thank you very much." I took the gun.

I hadn't held a gun in a while, not since I was sixteen at the gun range just forty-five minutes from our house. My step-father had taken my two younger sister and I. By then, I already shot at a pretty decent level, apparently a 'damn good shot', and I'd went straight into it, not waiting for any help. I didn't dilly-dally.

Fingers caressing the metal of the gun, I sighed, feeling at ease with it in my hands. I finally had something to protect myself with. I could finally show them I wasn't weak, that I could take care of myself, like I had been for the past couple of years. I'd always thought of myself an independent woman, and I was going to show it to these agents, who I was sure didn't think it.

I checked the clip—I'm sure Leon wouldn't be stupid enough to give me an empty one but hey—, and then put it back in, chambering a round in a blink of an eye.

Leon and Helena shared a look, and I grinned.

"So…shall we mosey on?"

* * *

**btw. you can dual wield in RE6. yeah. that's where the other gun comes from. xD probably stating the obvious. again.**

**i love the word mosey so much omg. it just sounds so funny and cute. i love odd words. /shot.**


	5. Four : Danger

**Oh-my-god. Don't kill me. /cowers.**

**I am so sorry for the delay. Like really, Nikki?! Two weeks!? Well almost two freaking weeks. I am seriously so sorry. A lot has happened. Got sick. School driving me crazy and working me out the ass. I just didn't have any time to write. But I FINALLY DID GUYS. I FINALLY DID. WAHHH. I missed this story so much. I've dedicated an entire notebook to this story, full of ideas and character traits and all kinds of stuff for this. I love it so much.**

**And I'm so, so, SO GLAD you guys like it too! I mean LOOK at those reviews! LOOK at those follows and faves! I'm crying hardcore, guys. No lie. I had NO clue you guys would like this story. If anyone for that matter would like it! It just blows me away! I'm so happy I could die~**

**So an update. In this chapter, you'll notice SI/OC is starting to show signs of change. And not just any change, a change in attitude, which is what she needed, it just took a little bit. It's not fully noticeable, and she hasn't fully changed, but you can tell she is. At least I hope. She's treating Leon and Helena a little nicer, not so much smartass-bitch-y. Hell she even holds a short convo with Leon. But you guys will just have to read to see. See! I told you, you guys. She's not going to be a bitch for long~**

**Okay so. Yeah. I'M SORRY FOR THE WAIT. **

**AND I'M SO HAPPY FOR THE REVIEWS/FAVES/FOLLOWS. **

**I hope you continue! Please please do! Thank you! And I hope you enjoy!**

**disclaimer: I DO NOT own RE or Helena or Leon! Just my SI/OC and anyone I decide to throw in!**

* * *

**chapter four. **

Shooting someone. I'd never had to, until now. Shooting a target seemed easy. Shooting someone who used to think, someone who used to live, someone who was sure to have loved ones that missed them and prayed for their safety in this crazy chaos, that…that was different. And it hurt. It was so wrong, so immoral, so sadistic. Taking someone's life, no matter if they practically already were dead, was not right. What I was doing _wasn't right_.

I still pulled the trigger. I still shot at them. One by one. As precise and dead on as possible. They would kill me. They'd turn me into them. It'd be as lifeless and unsatisfied with every life I took. Just like them. It was me or them. I knew that. With ever fiber of my being I _knew _that.

My hands still shook. My body still tensed. Sometimes my finger would freeze on the trigger, and Leon or Helena would have to shoot to save me.

"Nicole," Helena outstretched a hand and laid it on my stiff arm, still in the firing position. I was cold to my core. "Maybe you need a rest." She wasn't being hateful or rude, nor was she making fun. Helena was worried, genuinely worried for my health. Did she think I was going to lose it? Did she think I'd succumb to the insanity that filled the air and suffocated me, wanting me to give in so it could take control and kill me easily?

God maybe that would be for the best.

The world shifted then, like I was on a tight rope, trying to walk across it. My head spun and my eyes widened. Fatigue was creeping up, making to consume me. Why'd I think that? Why'd I think that giving up would do me any good? My stomach churned, and I knew I was about to throw up. Without a second thought, I raced to a corner in the room, past the desks, in the far back.

Not ashamed to say, I blew chunks. Gross.

Leaning back on the back of my legs, having fallen to a kneeling stance, I spit, making a face. I really wanted to brush my teeth, like really bad. No matter what I did the taste of that gunk coated my mouth. How disgusting.

"Feel better?"

I turned to look over my shoulder, meeting Leon's gaze. Once again, he looked concerned, just like Helena. I nodded, covering my mouth. As much I didn't really like the man, I knew it was ridiculous to subject him to my foul breath. I wasn't _that _mean.

A pack of gum was waved in my face. Blinking, I took it gingerly, almost hesitantly, and then eyed him. He raised an eyebrow, and gave a light shrug.

Well…I wasn't going to pass this up, even if it wasn't a toothbrush and some toothpaste. I'd have to manage with what I had. I opened the pack, ripped one out, and stuffed it viciously into my mouth. A burst of mint-y flavor engulfed it and I sighed contently. So much better. Standing, I allowed myself to smirk, and nodded.

"Alright. Let's keep moving."

* * *

The doors opened to reveal some sort of party area. Most the small round tables were flipped over carelessly, trash littered the ground, and the atmosphere screamed 'get out of there'. I licked my lips, stepping forward, anxiously looking left and right. I could hear a few groans from the undead beyond, but they sounded few in numbers. I supposed that was a good thing, but it made me even more anxious. It was quiet, deathly so, and I suppressed the urge to shrink into a tiny little ball in some corner behind a tree or something and hide forever. My stomach was still tight and doing flips, I felt like I was going to get sick again. I wouldn't do it though. It was disgusting and hardly the time for it. The lingering foul taste surfaced and I spit out my nearly flavorless piece behind me and replaced it with another stick. Leon had given me the whole pack. He didn't seem to care about giving it up either.

I followed behind them, my gun pointed to the ground, but ready to be brought up and fired if needed. Of course I was still fazed by the whole 'I'm killing people who used to be alive' and what not. But I digress. We walked past some metal railings onto a lush red carpet; well what used to be lush was now dirty. In front of us lied the way off campus, a security exit that needed a keycard in order to open. I cursed. Bloody perfect. I should have known. Nothing was _ever_ easy. I didn't even know why I'd gotten my hopes up.

Reaching up, I tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, and peered up at Leon as we walked to a pair of twin doors that would hopefully lead us to the keycard's whereabouts. Little by little I was starting to piece this man together. We'd only been together for a couple of hours, so I'd only figured out a few key traits of him. He came off as calm and collected, but behind those smoky gray eyes years of struggles were visible. They showed sometimes, namely when he pulled his trigger. It didn't show in his movements, no, but those eyes, they spoke. He had been though a lot, and this was probably just adding to the list.

I was sorry. Sorry for being mean. Hell…I was more than mean. I was a total bitch to him. Even so here he was, protecting me, worrying about me, _caring _for me. Helena too. I barely knew the two of them and I'd suddenly judged them. I was horrible.

I wouldn't say it out loud. I wouldn't say sorry just yet. I still didn't know. I still wasn't for sure if what I was seeing was true or fake. I wanted to study it more, study them more.

Funny thing was, I had this feeling they were doing the same to me. Sizing me up. Seeing what made me tick. Watching my body language. But maybe that was just my paranoid mind at work. Yeah. Maybe.

Hands pressing against the windows that were on the right side of the long hall, I assessed the outside. I could see the dead walking about lazily on the tennis courts. Someone stepped beside me, and by the sound of the weight dropped on the heel of the shoe, I guessed Leon.

"They're just out there…chillin'," I muttered.

"Well what else are they going to do? Find a nice place to have a tea party?" I could hear the laughter and sarcasm in his voice, and I knew he was smiling.

I shook my head, finding myself laughing. It felt good to laugh. It really did. "If only. Then we wouldn't have to really worry about them."

"Only if we made sure not to crash it."

"Ah but the sound of tea sounds so promising."

Looking up, I found Leon grimacing. "Don't like tea," he said.

A coffee man. Should have seen that one coming. I opened my mouth to comment, but we were cut off by Helena motioning to the door, and then punching in a code.

What came next made me wish that our conversation had never been interrupted. A siren, ear splitting, cringe worthy, blared loudly. Panic set in, Leon hurried to the window at my own windows right, and Helena took a window on the other side. Their weapons were poised instantly, and I hurried to do the same, looking up for a mere second to see zombies coming towards us with intent. I shot out my window, ignoring the glass that flew every which way, some cutting my face, not too bad though. I started to pop off rounds, making sure to aim at their legs, knocking them down as they full on sprint-limped our way.

Leon was talking frantically through his ear piece to Hunnigan, urging her to hurry and break through the security. He was so busy talking he didn't notice the zombies coming up behind him, from the other windows. I didn't hesitate. I didn't freeze. Raising my gun up, I shot two in the head, and then one in the leg, making it tumble to the ground at Leon's feet. He seemed to come back to reality, and proceeded to crush the zombie's head with his heel mercilessly.

Our eyes met, a single flash, a graze almost, and then I was off, heading to Helena's side, helping her fend of some of the horde she was dealing with. I ignored the tight feeling of my chest. With danger all around, there wasn't time to question it.

Replacing a clip, I discovered it was my last. I couldn't waste it. I switched to melee, or at least what I knew of it, switching from gun to knife. I slashed at my enemy's face, causing it to tumble back. With that kind of opening, I managed a blow to the zombie's chest with the heel of my boot, sending it out of the window head first. I heard the satisfied sound of its head bursting as it hit the ground and turned, just to find myself nearly surrounded.

My blood went cold, nevertheless, I positioned myself, my feet apart, right hand gripping my knife in a white knuckle tight grip, my left hand an equally as tight ball. I was ready to strike, like a snake, at my opponents.

Next thing I know I'm over someone's shoulder, and being lead to the now open door. Hunnigan had broken through the security. Holy shit…what a badass.

Leon dropped me from his shoulder, none to nicely, sweeping around to face the now closing door. The undead didn't give up though; two wedged themselves in, desperate to get their hands on us. Without a single moment wasted, the man fired rounds relentlessly until they disintegrated into nothing and Helena slammed the door shut, throwing over the board to lock the door.

I gapped, my brain dead. What the hell just happened? Having been dropped—quite rudely might I add—on my rear, I fell back, lying fully on my back in utter shock. My hands pressed to the side of my head, my mouth still wide open.

"Did you just…pick me up…and put me on your shoulder?" I asked, panting slightly. I was pretty sure he had. One hundred percent positive, but I still asked.

In a state of shock here.

Leon grinned, and gave a little shrug that said 'oh-it-was-nothing-really-you're-welcome'.

"Cave man," I accused, sitting up. I playfully glared at him. "You could have asked, you know? Like told me to come on. I would have."

"You looked like a busy woman. Besides we were pressed for time." There was that hint of laughter in his voice again.

I took the hand Helena offered to me, and stood with her help. "Still…cave man."

It wasn't until we were moving on in our search that I'd realized I'd been flirting. Well _we _were. I wasn't the _only _one doing it for the love of God. He was just as guilty.

_Oh my god. I can't believe it. In this crazy shit? In this crazy shit, I'm capable of flirting?! What the hell is wrong with me? What…is this my brains way of telling me 'Hey guess what Nikki. You're still sane. Surprise! Now no more puking, okay!?'_

And I stopped.

_WaitwaitwaitwaitWAIT. WHY WAS HE FLIRTING WITH ME?! Or was he flirting with me? Maybe he was just being his typical self. WHY DO I CARE!? Oh my god…what's going on with me? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!_

I facepalmed. I'm fucking stupid.

During our search, Helena had found some handgun ammo, and I'd gladly taken them without any second guesses, shoving them into left pocket. A sense of security washed over me with them in my possession. To be honest, even though I'd seemed confident in the melee fighting earlier, I really didn't like it at all. It was too close, too up close and personal. I'd been very, very vulnerable, more so than I had ever been thus far.

"Hey…there's the keycard," I gasped, finger shooting out to point at it. We were in the far back room, a tiny dark room with a dead body lying on its stomach. At least I _hoped _it was dead. The keycard was lying on the bottom of a big wide shelf on the wall.

Helena nodded, moving past the body to get it. My eyes never left it, at least until Helena had the keycard in her hand, and then I started to move towards her, to join her where she stood.

It sprang to life at her at that exact moment. I let my guard down, and so had she. If Leon hadn't been there, I was sure Helena would have been toast. After that scare, we made sure to go around any dead bodies, taking alternate routes to put as much space between them as possible. I made the mistake of thinking we were clear back in the main room. I relaxed, letting out a sigh and looking over my shoulder to smile softly at them.

And a zombie tackled me to the floor.

Everything happened in slow motion. My breath hitched in my throat, as the zombie pulled me down, and came a few inches from my face, its teeth chomping hungrily. I struggled to get it off, with ever fiber of my being.

A foot connected with its face, knocking it clean across the room. I scrambled backwards into Helena, who had helped me up. Leon stomped down on the zombie's head, before turning to me, and pulling me towards him. His eyes swept over me, looking for any signs of injury before breathing out a sigh of relief.

I did the same, and then said something I hadn't before—genuinely, without any sarcasm or hate.

"Thank you, Leon."

And I smiled too. Not fully, but bigger than the other smiles I'd given the whole day. Hell I even said his name for the first time.

Shock flashed across his face for a brief moment, and then it was gone, a smile quite like mine appearing. "It's no problem, Nicole."

Turning, I thanked Helena too. I wasn't sure why I'd all of a sudden wanted to thank them. I guess I was just happy to have them around, better yet be in their company. I was just…really thankful. I'd probably be dead if it weren't for them.

"I seriously can't wait to get off this campus. Let's hurry up and get out of here," I groaned as we sprinted up to the gate.

Leon shook his head as we stopped and waited for Helena to slide the keycard. "It only gets worse from here. I'm sure of it," he said, fairly displeased sounding.

I groaned again. Perfect. Just our lucky day.

The gate now up a decent height, the three of us slid under and watched it go back down and then moved on.

I mean…_I _moved on first, right through a fucking metal detector. Really not the greatest thing to do. It went off, proclaiming my stupidity with yet another blaring siren, bringing a whole horde of zombies running.

"What can I say," I smirked, shrugging slightly, even though I was mentally committing suicide. "My brains bring all the zombies to the yard." I executed a dramatic hair flip, because why the fuck not?

Helena stifled a laugh, while Leon tried an 'I'm-not-amused-that-was-not-funny-Nicole' look, but I could tell he was trying real hard not to grin.

Oh I'm such a comedian.

No time to lose, we moseyed on, going through twin doors. As they opened, another wave of Hell crashed on us, this one much, much worse.


	6. Five : Fright

**Another chapter upload this week. Because I owe you guys. /weeps**

**Not many reviews last chapter ;o; not like expected it. It's been a while! It's okay I understand! There was just one but it still meant a lot to me! So thank you!**

**Okay so this is where the story starts to pick up. Dramatic shit starts to happen all throughout this chapter, and will continue. But I WILL add some calm moments! The calm moments being talking between the three, and finding out about SI/OC's life! So BACKSTORY TIME NEXT CHAPTER~ hopefully. xD! **

**More noticeable change in SI/OC too in this chapter! I'm pretty proud of it. Granted she has another freak out, but hey. Who can honestly blame her? **

**Oooo and a LeonxSI/OC moment too! Well some. But I chalk it up as yet again something I think Leon would do for the person he's protecting. So yeah. I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT NONETHELESS!**

**Also. I've noticed I've neglected Helena a bit xD Poor Helena. So I'll start giving her more attention, hopefully have some Helena and SI/OC convos in. Yay~**

**I hope to see some feedback ;u; Y'alls words of encouragement mean so much to me! But don't be afraid to give me some constructive criticism! I don't mine (just no flames please wahhh i like fire but not that kind!)**

**ENJOY YOU AMAZING READERS YOU!**

**disclaimer: I own Leon's butt. Not really. I don't own him or Helena and not even RE! Just my SI/OC and any poor soul I kick into the chaos! **

* * *

**chapter five. **

You better believe I wanted to scream. Okay so picture this: a road full of zombies and railings blocking the path, and then a crazy white girl running full speed down said street, flailing her arms, tripping over her feet, but somehow managing to maneuver her tiny little ass over the blockades. Yeah. That's me. No joke.

"ComeoncomeoncomeoncomeonCOME ON," I bellowed in one breath.

Leon and Helena—all badass and sane like—ran behind me, shooting zombie's legs out from under them. They were trying to look serious and focused, but I could tell they wanted to let out a laugh at the way I was handling this whole situation. Well, at least Leon looked like he wanted to; Helena looked more worried about other things, probably the Cathedral, and how we were taking for-fucking-ever to find our way there, wherever there was.

My feet were flying down the street, my legs flying over the blockades. I was happy I'd taken track in high school, and at least went to the gym with Zoe back home whenever I could. (translation: when I wasn't lazing about like a fat sloth)

While congratulating myself—praising is a much better word I would say—I hadn't seen the police car at the end of the street, blocking the way. Leon yelled for me to slow down, but it was too late, my body connected with a harsh smack, my head hitting the driver sides door with a sickening crack. Immediately, my vision blurred, and I swore I could see stars.

"Hahaha…ha. Hello…car," I half laughed, half slurred, and fell back.

Leon caught me, and hurriedly helped me into the back seat, buckling me in fast, while Helena fended off the onslaught of zombies coming after us. My head lolled to the side, and I heard both of my companions enter the car. In a wild frenzy, both male and female looked around for the keys. All around us, the undead gathered, wanting us, needing us. Trying to rein myself back in, I leaned forward, gazing around.

Where did I usually hide my keys? The glove compartment? No that'd be too obvious, a car thief would look there first, I was sure of it. No it had to be somewhere else.

"There," I said, pointing.

Leon looked up quickly to where I was indicating they'd be, pulling it down and finding the keys. I offered him a dizzy smile, before leaning back.

And flipped out, because a zombie broke through Leon's driver side window. The scream came this time, and I did the only thing I could to help him. I pulled out my knife, leaned over the seat, and stabbed the zombie in the neck. It didn't faze him, so I did it again and again, until Leon started the car, hollering for me to sit back, but I didn't listen, wrenching out the blood coated knife to do it again.

My body slammed back into the back seat, my head feeling like it was going to break off and fly backwards, as Leon backed up the car and hit a wall. Tears sprung in my eyes, my vision blurring even worse then before, and Leon shifted gears, and hit the gas without hesitation.

The car rocketed forward, running over the dead that had been stupid enough to stand in front of it, and we were on the road.

"Nicole…Nicole look at me," Helena urged, and I tried to, but it hurt. My stomach was doing those flips again, churning dangerously. My head drooped to the left, and I caught sight of the blood covering my hand, my weapon crushed in the inside of it. My white button down was splattered with blood too, but I figured it had been ever since all this, it had just worsened. My body refused to move at all, and I just stared and stared at the blood. Red, copper smelling, sticky liquid. But this blood had a darker, black tint to it, like the blood itself was infected like its dead host. It made sense. So much sense.

My stomach lurched, like I was about to get sick, but I denied it, swallowing hard, forcing it all back. Panic flooded the very walls of my veins, and I found myself dropping my knife and reaching to wipe the blood off my hands, only to smudge it on the other. Hyperventilating, I continued, wiping aimlessly, desperation boiling and boiling, until I let the tears slip, and I cried out.

Helena was calling my name, trying to get me to calm down, but her voice was growing more and more distant. I grabbed the fabric of my button down, thinking if I could get it off, if I could just get it off, I would be able to breath right again. The blood smeared into my shirt, and I lost a little bit more of my sanity. Stars danced teasingly in my eyes.

Helena's hands found mine, but they were gone in an instant, and so was the gravity. The car was flipping, and I felt like a rag doll, being thrown carelessly around until finally it all stopped, and I was hanging upside down, my lungs threatening to collapse from being overworked. In my darkening vision, I saw flames swaying outside the car and figures I prayed were Leon and Helena.

My eyes started to fall then, the sound of the car door being tugged open flooding my ears.

"I gotcha," Leon grunted. I felt him wrap his arm around my waist before unbuckling the seat belt. My whole body weight dropped, and Leon gave another grunt, before setting me down onto the ground so he could gather me up and pull me out as gently as he could.

Cold, hard cobblestone penetrated my shirt and I reached out. I needed to find something to hold, something to ground me. My head was still spinning, and my sanity was still in danger of being consumed by the chaos. I didn't want to think about the blood, I didn't want to think about the death all around us, and the possibility of us, of me, losing my life to it all.

A calloused hand wrapped around mine, their fingers squeezing ever so carefully, and their thumb softly caressing the top of my hand in a gentle comforting and reassuring way. I wanted to open my eyes a little more, so I could see who it was, though I had a feeling I already knew.

He began talking, Helena chiming in, to Hunnigan through his headset. He sounded worn out, tired even. I knew the man had to be tired of dealing with things like this. How old was he anyways? I made a mental note to find out.

Oh god there I go again. Why did I even care? I really was losing my mind.

"Nicole can you hear me?" Leon asked, squeezing my hand yet again.

I opened my dry lips in order to answer, but nothing came out. I resorted to tightening my grip on Leon's hand, not as hard or tightly as he was; it was like a little nudge, just to show him I could.

"She needs to rest for a minute."

"But Leon—"

"Nicole isn't going to be able to move and there is no way I'm going to force her," Leon cut her off. His voice held a certain edge to it that demanded Helena not to say anything further. A kind of finality, I suppose. "Besides…we both need it too. That crash did some damage."

I didn't hear Helena say anymore, but I could hear her footsteps as she walked away, somewhere behind me, I guessed.

Guilt stung me. All of it started to pile up: the death of Adam, me being a bitch, Leon and Helena treating me nicely and protecting me no matter what I did or said, losing my mind and breaking down one moment after the other. Uselessness struck me like a blow to the face. I wanted to cry again, but there were no more tears to cry, at least not then. My throat constricted, and I opened my mouth, groping for the two words I wanted to say so badly, had been wanting to say but too stubborn to do so.

I found my voice.

"I'm sorry."

No longer keeping myself surfaced, I fell back into the darkness that had been tugging on my consciousness, slipping away from the harsh, unforgiving reality.

Still holding his hand. Refusing to let it go, even as I left the world for a bit.

_Tiny hands clasped the much bigger hand. The little girl, her hair cut short, in a kind of bob style hair cut, her bangs brushing over her long eyelashes, smiled big, laughing hysterically, as she tried her hardest to force that giant hand down to the table top, but coming up short every time._

"_Oh come on, Uncle Adam! Let me win! Let me win!" She cried out. When he refused, she went to Plan B._

_The girl stared up at him, her eyes wide, her mouth forming into the most adorable pout ever. "Pwease, Uncle," she sniffled, like she was about to cry. _

_Naturally, he gave into the girl's request, and she grinned in triumph as she pushed his giant hand down. _

"_I win," she declared, jumping up to stand on her chair. Her arms outstretched into the air, her hands balled into fists. "I beat Uncle Adam!"_

_The man laughed, before grabbing her, wrapping his arms around her waist, her back to his front, and he spun her around. "Oh you and your puppy dog face! That's the only reason you won, Mick," he teased, using the nickname he'd given the girl when he'd first met her. Back when she was eight and wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt._

"_Nuh uhhh! I did not! I won fair and square," she exclaimed._

_He set her down and then began to tickle her wildly, making her giggle and attempt to run away._

"_Noooo! Uncle Adam stopp—ahahaha! You're such a meanie!"_

_The man simply grinned, stopping after a while and taking her in his arms. "You're the meanie, you little trickster." He pressed his lips to her forehead._

_The girl simply smiled, and hugged him close._

"_I love you, Uncle Adam!"_

"Nicole…you need to wake up."

My face scrunched up, and I let out a childish whine. "No, Uncle Adam. I don't want to get up and go to school. It's so _boring_." I pushed away the hand gripping my shoulder and turned over.

Face met cold ground and everything snapped back into my mind. Eyes flashing open, I sat up a little too fast, and my head did a three-sixty spin. "Ugh," I grumbled, rubbing my temples. "What the hell happened?"

Turning, I looked to a startled Leon. My eyebrows furrowed as I watched it disappear completely, replaced with a passive expression, borderline collected. "We crashed and you had a mini panic attack. We let you rest for a little bit, and ourselves."

I made an 'o' shape with my mouth, and then looked down at myself. My cloths were a mess, namely my button down. I made a face. I probably would never be wearing this again, no hope in saving it after all this. Taking a deep breath, I moved to stand, refusing help from Leon. I wanted to do this myself. After what seemed like forever, I was back on my feet, granted a little unbalanced, nevertheless I'd done it.

I pushed back the hair from my face and turned to look at Helena who was leaning over something.

That something being a hole in the fucking ground.

"Oh _hell no_," I exclaimed. My head swirled around to look at Leon. "We aren't going down there are we?"

"There's no other way," was his reply, and smirked. Smugly smirked.

My jaw twitched. Did he just…?

"Oh come on…you're not scared are you?"

"Um. DUH." I threw my hands in the air. "I can't do it. Anything below ground I just can't do it. It mixes in with my fear of being buried alive. No. Fuck that shit. I'm staying right here. Plain and simple."

As if on cue, moans from the dead came from somewhere beyond the fire and cars surrounding us. I flinched, clenching my teeth.

"So…what was that again?" Leon raised an eyebrow.

_Oh he's enjoying this isn't he?! What a little—_

"We really should get moving," Helena spoke up. Facing her way, she offered me a smile. "Don't worry, Nicole. We'll go first." The woman crouched down, and then jumped in, disappearing.

Leon was next, and when he disappeared I stomped over, gritting my teeth in the process, and leaned over the hole to peer down inside. It was pitch black.

My heart started to beat fast, my chest getting tighter and tighter every minute I delayed, until I couldn't stand it anymore and crouched down. One hand on the side, I jumped down into it, and landed with a thud on the hard ground below. Sadly, I lost my footing, and fell backwards into someone's chest.

Light flickered on from both of my companion's lights and I looked over my shoulder up at Leon. We were close to each other, like before in the security camera computer room on campus. Only this time, I wasn't the first to pull away, Leon did, taking a step back, letting go of my arm, which he'd grabbed as I fell.

"See that wasn't so bad," He said. His voice sounded far off though, and the words seemed kind of forced out. And then I watched as Leon drew a blank, his eyes wavering as we stared each other down.

"Leon?" I reached up, pressing a hand to his shoulder and shaking him a bit.

He snapped back, looking at me for a mere moment and then to Helena. "Gonna be a tough road."

She nodded, and then took off down the steps leading into the sewers. Leon, however, remained rooted there.

I removed my hand from his shoulder, taking a step back from him. "Leon…are you okay?" I asked, gulping roughly.

He gave me a nod. And then…and then he pulled me into him. Wrapping his arms around me, holding me to him, to that hard, but obviously muscally chest of his. I turned rock solid for a minute until I realized he was hugging me. Confusion. Why in the world was he hugging me? I didn't know what to do. Inside my head, I was freaking out, little Nicole's running around screaming for answers. One finally just told me to hug him back, which seemed totally logical and I felt like a dumbass for not doing it already.

Unfortunately, Leon was already pulling away. Awkwardness set in then. We both looked away from each other, at anything, anything at all we could find.

I scratched my cheek, and Leon scratched the back of his head and we just stood in silence. I wasn't going to be the one to break it. Hell I didn't even know what just happened.

It took a minute or two and then he finally spoke.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to make it awkward or anything. It just looked like you needed one."

_I _needed one? _I _wasn't the one who had totally randomly spaced out a couple on minutes ago. I was pretty sure he'd need the hug. Honest to god.

"Um…it's okay. I guess I did," I mumbled, taking the fall because Leon was a man, and men don't usually admit to the things they do.

_This is so fucking awkward. Why me? Where the hell are you at when I need you, Zoe? You'd know what to do._

Which was a lie, because Zoe was as clueless as I was in situations like this. Wait, had I ever actually _been _in something like this? Screw it.

"Let's get moving. Helena's waiting," Leon said, and started down the steps.

It took me a minute to follow.

I guess because I'd suddenly noticed something strange. My cheeks…they were warm, and I suddenly felt hotter than a stove. Inside, my stomach was doing those flips again, and sickness or nausea wasn't the culprit. Not this time.

Yeah. I didn't question those. I was in a sewer, below ground level, with the possibility of being buried under rubble.

I did not give two shits at the moment.

Hell no.

Right?

_Mother of god. Help me. Please_, I prayed. _Give me the strength and will power to get out of this all and back to the surface without dying or beating the crap out of Leon for making shit awkward. Please._

* * *

I tried not to look up at the ceiling. That's what made me want to freak out more. Looking at the ceiling meant I'd lose it again, start hyperventilating and crying. It reminded me of a coffin, with dirt weighing down the top, threatening to break and let it in. I had to make sure it wouldn't happen again. It wouldn't happen again. No more panic attacks. No more breaking down. So, as to keep from it, I started with one of the things that had caused me to freak out earlier.

The sewer water was the last thing I wanted to touch. It didn't smell at all pleasant, but it didn't look too dirty, and I needed it. Bending down, I outstretched my hands and stuck them into the rushing stream, not bothering to push up my sleeves, and began to wash off the blood.

I wanted to bend down and splash some in my face, just to wake myself up a bit more. I was dead tired, the little rest I had earlier didn't help much at all. But I knew there was no time to rest again, and I sure as hell wasn't sleeping in a place like this. It was bad enough I was awake, asleep, where one was vulnerable, I would be in more danger.

Lifting my hands out of the water, I inspected them for any remnants, and then shook them a few times, before wiping the remains onto my shorts. I pushed my bangs from my eyes and attempted to run my hands through my long, slightly curled strands, meeting tangles along the way. I was tender-headed, so I just gave up, plus my head was already hurting, tugging on my hair would only make it worse.

Turning, I jogged down the corridor and rounded a corner—of course I noticed some broken crate pieces in the corners of the far walls dead end, what the hell was up with that?—and saw both agents waiting by a door. My mouth grew dry, and I pointed to it.

"Where…where does that lead?" I asked.

Really wish I hadn't. Like _really _wished I hadn't.

Leon pushed open the door.

To reveal a subway tunnel.

I died right then and there.

Okay so, figuratively, but yeah you get it.

"Nonononono!" I shook my head fiercely, and my arms for emphasis. "Hell no! Double hell no!" I took a step forward, pointing furiously at Leon. "I said I'd go into the sewer, not a subway tunnel! This is where I draw the line! I refuse! I won't go in there! You'll have to kill me for me to even agree to go in there, and even then I'll come back to haunt you and refuse!" I stomped my foot like an angry child. "Are you _trying _to scare me?! Are you _trying _to make me freak out again?! Are you—this is _not _funny, Helena! Stop laughing! Don't encourage the…the caveman!"

Helena held up her hands defensively, still laughing softly. "I'm sorry, Nicole. You just…you just look so funny." The brunette woman looked to the blonde male, grinning. "Her face is really red. Does your face always get that red when you're angry, Nicole?"

The question only made my face grow redder. I reached up, covering my face, completely embarrassed now. I hated when this happened. It was one of the things I was self conscious about, one of the top things. My face got red easily and over stupid little things, from being upset over something, to very intimate situations. I was a mess. A hot mess.

A frustrated groan slipped through my lips, and I went down, squatting, still covering my face.

White hot fear clouded my better judgment. I needed to keep moving, knowing that there was no time for me to be a baby again. I needed to grow up and suck it up, but I couldn't help myself. So many things could go wrong in there. So many things, so many possibilities, and most weren't in my power. And that scared me so much. If I wasn't in control of a situation, if I wasn't in control of _myself_, I didn't know what to do. It was my biggest downfall, my biggest obstacle, one I was still trying to overcome.

Hands wrapped around my wrist, trying to force my hands away and reveal my still red face. I squeezed my eyes closed. I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to see or look at either of them. They were putting me through so much, I wasn't ready for it. Too much, it was all too much for me to handle. And it was happening so fast. Too fast. I wasn't in control. I wasn't in control. _I wasn't in control of anything at all_.

A hand, firm and comforting, pressed against my back, rubbing it reassuringly.

I don't know what made me finally open my eyes. I wasn't sure if it was because of the hands gripping my wrists, or the hand rubbing my back so sweetly. I did, hesitantly at first, but I did it.

Leon was bent down in front of me, Helena at my side, both smiling kindly. My fears melted away then, not all of them, but enough to take a huge weight off my shoulders, allowing me to relax noticeable.

"We said we were going to take care of you," Helena spoke up. "And that's what we're going to do." The brunette reminded me suddenly of my best friend. I could see them both getting along nicely together. They'd have to meet after all this, if we survived, I'd see to it.

"We're right behind you, Nicole. We're shaken too, but we have to keep moving," Leon said, and I looked at him. I realized then I was being selfish. I hadn't really taken their feelings into account, and I was so sorry for that. I really, truly was a hot mess. "We'll find out answers about all this and you'll be there to find out with me. We both want answers."

I did. I really did. I hadn't really thought about it until now. Why had my Uncle been infected? What started this infection? Why? Who? I wanted to know. I wanted to know terribly.

And that was enough reason to keep moving forward. For my Uncle. For my family, who would be just as hurt as I was, as hurt as I still am, about his death.

_Death…_

I hadn't thought murder. I hadn't thought of it. It hadn't been the word that came up as soon as I thought about the horrendous event. Had I forgive Leon? Had I finally coped with the fact that he had only been trying to protect Helena from being bitten and turned?

Yes. But…it still ached. It still stung.

Standing, I stared at Leon, who stood also, followed by Helena. Something boiled in my stomach, spreading throughout me. Courage. Bravery. Resolution. My hand reached up to the back of my shorts, where I pulled out the handgun. I gripped it airtight, and let out a deep breath.

Had to do this. Would do this.

My eyes met both agents, and I gave a nod.

"I'm ready. I may still be scared, but…but I know I'm not alone. So…let's keep going." A shy smile curled at my lips, and I glanced down at my feet, my face a little less hot now. "Thank you again. I…I don't know how to show you two how much it means to me. Your words. Your protection." I looked up. "Thank you for everything."

Leon reached up, and ruffled my hair. He smiled, an edge of playfulness in it, but I noticed something else, something I couldn't quite place, something that caught me off guard.

"Thank us when this is all over, and we're out of this. And we _are _getting out. So don't even think about thinking otherwise."

I couldn't agree more.

Of course we'd get out. I had to see my family and Zoe again. I wouldn't give up. I wouldn't give in. Not again. Not ever again would I let myself break like the times before. From then on I'd keep moving forward, I'd never let fear control me again. I'd fight. I'd get the answers I desired, both of us, all of us desired. And I'd get out of this shit. Alive. Maybe a little broken, scarred, and bruised, but alive.

I'd accept nothing less.

Together, the three of us exited through the red door, one after the other, and jumped down to the track covered floor of the subway tunnel. The darkness a dark blanket. The quiet an imitation of peacefulness.

We walked down the tunnel, into the unknown and deadly depths of the underground. An underground playground for the nonliving.


	7. Six : Frenzy

I am SO DAMN SORRY FOR TAKING FOREVER TO UPDATE OMG. As I'm a reader too, I HATE when an author I like doesn't update my favorite story in forever! It just makes me so sad! I never meant to be like that, trust me guys! I really didn't but a lot, and I mean A LOT, came up!

Let me start out saying, I got a little writers block after updating last. But more stuff seemed to hit me AFTER THAT. My best friend of three years ended up moving to Florida, and I just died. We were really close, and she helped mold the Nikki that is today, so it took a huge chunk out of me. I got depressed, and emotionally exhausted. It was just the worst. When I finally got into writing again, and got over myself.

MY COMPUTER DECIDED TO BITE THE DUST. I had a TERRIBLE virus. Don't even ask me how I got it. I don't know. My step-father and I started trying to fix it [he's a computer tech for UPS 8D]. Took 3 DAYS for us to realize THERE WAS NO HOPE FOR MY POOR LAPPY. So we sent it to a computer guy, two days later I get my lappy back and...EVERYTHING IS GONE. It was completely wiped. Which was the plan! Luckily I saved most of my documents and pictures on my USB before. One of those documents being this story! /claps

Another three days spending most of my time re-installing most of my crap. AND I STARTED WRITING AGAIN. I missed it so much. You guys have no clue ;u;! Thank you so much for sticking with my story on my crazy hiatus! I seriously appreciate it. You guys are the BEST. SO THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO YOU AWESOME PEOPLE! /confetti and love

**zoomzebby**: Thank you SO much for the review. I'm so happy you like my story so much to read it that much. God it means so much to me. Fuuu. Her reaction should be hilarious when the Cathedral comes up, and as for Ada Wong. Well. I'm trying to think of a good way for her to deal with that. I'm not totally sure, but I have an idea. I just hope you guys like it when it's all said and done!

**Renee**: Since I couldn't message you...GOD THIS REVIEW. ALL MY FEELS. I seriously had a heartattack when I read it. I do for all the reviews, but this one. God it just made me so happy. I read it during my depression too, so it made me a little happy then! I'm usually a silent reader too, Renee, don't feel bad. xD Ugh. I just. Thank you SO much. You are so hilarious, don't worry about rambling, it was adorable and I loved it. KYAHHH THANK YOU SO MUCHHH! I hope you continue to read. It would make me the HAPPIEST. /lovelovelove

**Foresthunter**: I've glad you like that about her! I try to make it realistic as possible. And I can just imagine some girl acting like her during this crazy chaos xD! Not just me~

**Night**: Couldn't message you either fdhsufd. Ugh another fantastic review. Thank you so much god. I'm just gonna go cry for hours. I HOPE YOU CONTINUE TO READ! /YOU/ ROCK!

**X1Sweetie1X**: FJDSHAUISDFISA THANK YOU SO MUCHHH~! I TRYYY~! Well I'll have to include a significant amount of good ol' Ada for Nicole/Leon moments. At least I think so. xDD But don't worry, most of the moments will be good c: I SAID MOST. XDD EVERYONE SHOULD PREPARE FOR SO MAJOR FEELS. AND MAYBE SOME FIGHTING/ARGUMENTS. Especially for what is to come. But I mean, that's not until China. NO SPOILERS. ;D

**PennyGirl224**: Not sure if I've replied to you yet. Sorry if I haven't! To all of you actually. I'm REALLY glad you like my story! I really appreciate it! To answer your question, I am actually! There is an event that will take place in China, the same event I hinted on in Sweetie's review reply, that I won't spoil, that will cause for more converstation between the B.S.A.A. agents and Nicole and company. Not much, I'm afraid, at least I don't think yet. I'll try! Piers WILL be there though! Since he and Chris are in Leon's campaign after all! I wouldn't dare cut their meeting out! HNGGG AND I LIKE PIERS TOO SO YEAH KFHZSISDJFSF xDD

THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN FOR STICKING WITH ME MY DEARS! I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER! WOOOO~! oh and if I forgot to reply to anyone, I'm so sorry. I'm still reeling from everything. I replied this way because well...much easier and less time consuming ;u; I hope you guys don't mind. I may continue to do this!

LONG CHAPTER BECAUSE YOU GUYS DESERVE IT! FULL OF SOME FUNNY MOMENTS AND THE TAD BIT OF BACK STORY I PROMISED! ;u; Forgive me for any spelling errors or such! I was lazy and didn't feel like proofing xD!

**disclaimer**: Don't own RE or Helena or Leon. But I do own my badass SI/OC 8D and anyone else that I kick in. xD

* * *

**chapter six.**

It was the last thing I wanted to see. The last thing I wanted to deal with in this kind of place. I don't know why, but I imagined that down here, it would be safe. I was naïve. So naïve to think it. Breathing heavy, I rushed at a zombie, using my shoulder to knock it down with as much force as I could manage. It stumbled forward onto the ground, and I found myself at its head, crushing said head with the heel of my boot. It stopped moving, and then slowly disintegrated.

My body was still reeling from the events before. I was sure I had a concussion, but I refused to rest anymore. There was just no point in it. I had a feeling my body was going to be like this for a while, until everything was over and done. And if I did stop, I wouldn't be able to get up again, like ever. I shook my head. Thinking wasn't getting me anywhere. I had to shut it off. I had to shut it all off and just do. Just do what I needed to do here and now. Worry about everything else later.

And that's when a sound cut off everything.

A horn of sorts, loud and continuously blaring. The rocking of something running down the tracks.

My heart dropped into the lowest pit of my stomach, and I wheeled around, eyes wider than ever before, threatening to pop out of my sockets.

No.

It couldn't be.

"Trains coming," Helena yelled behind me.

It was.

I couldn't move. I couldn't even scream, as I saw the lights coming towards us. I was standing right in the middle of the tracks. Right there, frozen solid.

"Nicole! Nicole move!"

I finally did. In a split second, right before the train could hit me, right when it was way too close for comfort; I rushed to the wall on the opposite side, and hugged it for dear life.

The screaming of the train going by flooded my ears, but I swore I could hear Leon screaming my name.

And then it was gone, and the eerie silence replaced it. I opened my eyes, turning my body so I could press my back against the cold wall. I was surprised to find myself controlling my breathing fairly well. Even more surprised at myself when I grinned at Leon and Helena and said with cheerfulness, "That was fun. But let's not do it again shall we?"

They scoffed, before reloading their guns and moving on. I hurried to catch up; our pace was significantly slower though. Like they were tired. I looked at them. They were. Dead tired even. Reaching out, my hand stopped in mid air, and I began pulling back. They wouldn't want to stop. They weren't wired like that, I could tell. Would I have to take the fall? Pretend I needed a break, so they could too?

I stopped walking, staring at their backsides intently, until they turned, questioning why I'd stopped and if I was alright.

It was about me. It was always about me. Never how they were. Never about them. Annoyance. No way. No way was I going to let them get away with it, away with putting me first. I got that I was supposed to be protected, and there was no doubt in my mind that I needed it somewhat, but I wasn't going to be a burden. I wasn't going to be singled out, and take up all of their thoughts.

My mouth opened, the words spilling from them before I could think them over. "I want you two to rest." When they gave me questioning looks, I quickly elaborated, face growing hot. "I…I can see that you two are tired. I'm not stupid. You two need rest…and I don't mean like a two minute or five minute break. Like at least ten." My mouth grew desert dry, and I found myself looking at the ground. I sounded stupid, and it was really embarrassing.

"We don't have time for a break, Nicole," Helena answered, obviously voicing both agents' opinions.

I nodded, letting out a sigh. "It's just…I feel like I'm burden. And I don't _want _to be that. You two should think of yourselves too! Not just me!" I looked up, giving them a pleading look. "I don't want to burden. I don't want you two to give up your own safety for mine. I can take care of myself, you know?" I gulped then, and shook my head fiercely. "I-I mean I _appreciate_ it, don't get me wrong, I just…"

Leon smirked, holding up a hand to silence me. I did so gladly. He opened his mouth and spoke, a soft edge of amusement clear. "It's alright, Nicole. We get what you're saying. You're not a burden, trust me. We'll rest shortly, okay? This isn't exactly a great place to relax."

I sighed inwardly. Yeah, I knew that already. But I didn't argue. I just nodded and scratched the back of my head.

"Let's keep moving, I think I see something up ahead," Helena urged, and started walking.

I moved to Leon's side, peering off into the endless seeming tunnel. Helena had been right, I could see something too. It was kind of bright, like…fire? Fire maybe? I wasn't totally sure. But if it was fire, then it couldn't be good.

I'm so pessimistic.

"So you're scared of underground places? Any more fears you wanna tell us about so we're prepared?"

I looked at Leon sharply, eyes narrowing, lips forming a tight straight line. At first the question caught me off guard, like I hadn't expected them to ask me. And then my suspicious, cautious side took over. My hands were clammy, and I found myself swallowing hard. Tell about more fears? To me that was like revealing myself, telling them more about me than they needed to know. We'd only known each other about a couple of hours. That wasn't nearly enough time to become friends, at least not in my book. I wouldn't see them after all this would I? I wouldn't talk to them or hear from them after all this? Or would I? And did I _want _that? Did I _want _to talk to these two after this crap? Did I _care_? Was it _worth _it?

I stopped walking then, realizing something.

It was there. Not as grown, not as pronounced, but there.

Feelings. I cared about these two. I'd allowed—allowing still—myself to get close to them, let them in, getting used to them and growing close. That was dangerous. More dangerous than what was going on now. More dangerous than ever, to me. That wasn't good. They could die at any moment, _I _could die. And it would hurt, just like with Uncle Adam, just like with everyone else in my life I'd let this happen with.

I'd done this. I'd brought this on myself.

So I should put back up those walls, block them out and continue on like nothing happened, like I didn't cared about them. Snap at them, let them get hurt; allow them to hurt themselves for my own safety. I mean, who cared? It was their job after all and I shouldn't stop them from doing it. What did their lives matter to me? If they wanted to get themselves killed, take on zombies and bullets and who knows what else, for me, then who was I to stop them? Just let them do them. I could handle this myself, actually. I could walk away from them and get out of this chaos myself. Leave them behind to fend for themselves.

No. No I shouldn't. I needed them. I needed them, and I kind of didn't mind. It was a relief to have people by my side during this, for someone to have my back and care about me too. They cared, right?

They cared…?

"Hey…you alright?"

Blinking, I met their gazes, and offered them a sad smile.

"Alcohol. Alcohol scares me." I shook my head, laughing nervously. "I doubt we'll encounter that, but yeah, alcohol. And um…spiders. Can't stand those either."

"Alcohol?" Helena moved towards me, and I knew what she was going to ask. Why? Why was I scared of alcohol? Alcohol wasn't so bad right?

Wrong.

"Don't like to drink?" Leon asked, but I could hear a bit hesitance, like he wasn't sure he should ask.

I wished he hadn't.

"It's not that I just…" Another head shake. I was growing frustrated with myself. Suddenly, it had become nearly impossible to talk correctly. I'd never had this problem before. Never. Then again, no one really ever asked me about myself.

Not that I would tell.

Composing myself, I began my explanation carefully. "My father drunk. He was a binge drinker. The week he'd work hard, he'd be okay, and then the weekend would come and he'd be drunker than a dog. When he first started it was fine. He wasn't that bad. And then…" My voice broke. It just broke. I could hardly breathe, hardly swallow. My hands, uncharacteristically, were shaking, and I couldn't stop them. Of course many times earlier they'd shake and tremble, but this was different, and for different reasons. "The fights started. Continued on until the divorce when I was 7. One day, I think in June, Dad left for work. Mom had our bags pack with the important necessities within the hour; we got a ride to the airport, took the plane to Washington D.C. and that was that. Mom got remarried to my now step-father within the year, in December, and I met Uncle Adam the year after that."

"Nicole…"

I looked up and met the agents' stares, finding surprise, astonishment. I almost laughed out loud. Only when I finally felt the wetness on my cheeks, did I realize what fueled most of their shock. My hands found face, and did the only thing I knew how to do when talking about this situation and dealing with its emotional outcome.

I just laughed. Smiled. Shrugged. That's all I could do. "Don't worry," I said, still smiling. "It's nothing. This happens every time I talk about it. I guess I'm just happy it's all over, that's why I cry." I rubbed away the traces of tears with the back of my hands.

"I'm sorry that you had to deal with that, Nicole. Especially so young," Helena apologized wholeheartedly.

I answered with another shrug and a simple, 'not your fault, don't have to apologize for it.' As we began walking again, I noticed Leon's sudden silence. Looking over at him, I found his eyes fixed straight ahead, with an expression on his face that just scream, 'I'm over thinking'. With a sigh, I elbowed him, not too hard, to catch his attention. Successful, I childishly stuck my tongue out at him, hoping to lighten the mood.

He chuckled lightly, and I glowed.

And when I say glowed, I lit up like a roman candle. So fucking out of character. I shook myself, mentally slapping myself several times for good measure. Yet again I was stupefied by my strange emotions and reactions around this man. I was never like this around other boyfriends I'd had in the past, not even this bad around the big boyfriend I'd had that had meant more to me then my life itself. Weird. Really weird.

"Fire," I heard Leon say.

My eyes flickered up rapidly. Definitely fire. I'd been right. I shivered, cold as hell then. I assumed it was simply because of the low temperatures in the subway, but that was quickly thrown out the window as the most ugly looking creatures walked from the thick fog down the tunnel in front of us.

Dogs. Ugly, distorted, mangy dogs.

"No," I bellowed, backing away. "I don't do animal abuse!"

"Do they look like they care, Nicole," Leon retaliated, reloading his gun. "Do they look like dogs?"

I shook my head furiously.

_Get it together, Nikki! Leon's right! Not real! Dead! Dead dogs! Come on! Get ready! This is about to be the most grueling battle yet. _

My hands wrapped tightly around my gun. "Not real," I muttered. "Not alive. Not real. Not alive." I repeated this and repeated this, and only stopped when Leon and Helena let of rounds, capping the dogs in the head.

My bullets pierced their disgusting flesh, the mantra repeating in my head now, louder than before as the dogs got up and attacked.

* * *

After the dogs, and smashing two crates finding a couple of ammo rounds –what the hell is up with that anyways—we'd continued down the tunnel, and further into danger involving flashlights quitting and zombies sneaking around like fucking ninjas to eat us. We prevailed in the end. Duh.

Down another tunnel we went, this time a double one and I had to say, I was pretty chill for a girl in a zombie apocalypse. So chill, I was singing, which I only did around few. It was low, barely noticeable, but I was jamming, with a little bounce in my step.

"It's not right, but it's okay! I'm gonna make it anyway! Pack your bags, up and leave! Don't you dare come running back to me!" Whitney Houston, fuck yeah.

Naturally, my ray of sunshine had to be spit on right? Because I mean, it's only proper! Nicole doesn't need a moment of time to calm herself and take a little break from it all. No, she's perfectly fine. I mean…it's _only_ a **giant fucking swarm of zombies coming for her this time**.

No biggy, right?

"Fuck you," I screamed, nailing a zombie in the head. "And you too! And you! Take it! Take it like the man you are! Okay…so maybe _you're_ not a man, but hey! Why don't I _make_ you one! Haha!"

"She's lost it finally," Helena commented, before round house kicking a zombie, making its head explode all boss like.

"Just a little," Leon replied, and continued doing what he did best, kicking ass.

I chose not to comment. Honestly I was having fun. Killing zombies and bad mouthing them. I'm pretty sure if this was in a video game, I'd be doing the same. Wouldn't anyone?

"It's not right, but it's okay! I'm gonna make it anyway! Pack your zombie bags, up and leave! Don't you dare come chasing back after me!" A grin spread on my face. Yeah, I was entertained thoroughly.

Don't say you wouldn't be.

I swear I'm not _crazy_. I still have _some _marbles!

* * *

"Hey is that the train that came through earlier," I asked, pointing at one stopped directly in our direction. I tilted my head, and then looked to my companions, eyebrows raised.

"It sounds like it's operating," Leon commented, stepping up on the platform and moving to the door with Helena behind him. I leaned over, peering as Leon tried to open it, slamming his shoulder into it. No dice.

Moving back, I tapped my chin, and then got one of those brilliant ideas I always have. (Don't look at me like that, I'm not really full of myself, these things only happen once and a while after all!)

"Hey Leon, hoist me up there. Maybe I can get in through the top somehow."

Their response was not what I was hoping for. I should have seen it coming. Not sure why I didn't.

"No way, Nicole," Leon refused, shaking his head.

"I agree. Let me do it," Helena cut in, ever quick to volunteer herself.

My irritation rose during this. "Um…no. Forget it. I'm going," I told her. "And I'm tired of just shooting zombies and shit. I want to be a little more helpful then that! So I'm going in. Even if you don't help, Leon. I will _find _a way. If that means humiliating myself then so be it." I stood up straight, daring them to refuse me again.

Leon sighed, a really heavy one, and I knew I'd won. He stepped down and got into position. Surprisingly, Helena didn't protest anymore, instead taking a ready position at the door, gun tight in her hands.

My left foot found Leon's cupped hands, and I readied myself to be thrown up.

"Be careful, Nicole."

Our eyes once again caught, grazing at the last moment as I felt myself tossed into the air, and landing not too perfectly onto the subway top. I'd made it, however, so who cares. On top, I discovered an entrance, but didn't jump straight into it blindly. I scanned the area, noticing some dead body lying face down, but that was it. Nothing jumped out at me. Nothing screamed danger.

Taking a deep breathe, I position myself, legs hanging into the train, and then dropped carefully.

And the dead body decided to come alive. The man grabbing my foot and moaning into my ear as he made to feast on my flushed skin.

* * *

**cliff hanger yes? xD don't worry! next chapter will be eventful and great and stuff! hopefully! [if this one wasn't idk ._.] working on it as we speak!**


	8. Seven : Disaster

**Another upload this week, yes ;u;? **

**Not really all sure about this chapter though. Idk. I guess it's okay xD! Forgive me if it's not! Some funny parts. I guess. I thought they were! And I SWEAR HELENA WILL TALK MORE. Idk why but it's hard shoving her in. ;n; i'm so sorry helena...wahhh~**

**I'd love to hear from you guys ;u; really! Feedback is much appreciated! pleaseee~**

**disclaimer: Don't own anything. Just Nicole my SI/OC. And others. **

* * *

**chapter seven.**

He moaned into my ear hungrily, crawling close, his teeth ready to dig into me. My gun, however, wiggled its way into his mouth, cocked and ready. If this had been a cartoon, like one of those Acme ones, the zombie would have frozen with a dumb expression on his face and managed to get out a, 'huh?', before the trigger was pulled.

Not a cartoon though, but it would have been less gruesome had it been. So I guess that was a plus. Maybe? Possibly?

Leon and Helena were calling my name after the gunshot. They were all frantic and trying to open the door. I'm not ashamed to say I stopped and enjoyed it a bit. Maybe a couple of seconds of it, nothing over the top. Pushing open the door, I was bombarded by Leon, hands gripping my arms, scanning me over. Helena pushed her way in, surveying the surroundings, and gave a tiny gasp at the zombie dead on the floor.

"What what what!" I exclaimed. I pushed Leon away and took a step back for some space. "Don't get your boxers in a bunch! I'm fine! See look!" I spread my arms out and did a slow spin. Then I realized he might not be able to tell due to the blood caked on my shirt and various places on my legs and face. "Okay so…you can't really tell, but I promise I wasn't bitten or scratched or anything. Scouts honor, guys."

Helena laughed softly, and moved over the dead carcass, scanning further. She gave us a nod and then moved on down the cart.

"Boxers?"

My face grew hot, but I pretended it hadn't and that I wasn't fazed at all. "What? Don't wear boxers or something?" I moved passed him, hopping over my dead friend I'd gotten so acquainted with just a few seconds ago and then sadly had to put out of his misery. "My last boyfriend did. And a couple before him. I just assumed you did," I stated, with a bored tone.

And then I realized what I'd said.

Cue Nicole freak out moment.

"Oh my god! I mean…I'm not a _whore _or anything! Sweet Jesus! I just—fuck _me_! I really don't know how to shut up sometimes—"

"You've had boyfriends?" The male asked, acting as if he hadn't heard what I'd said.

Stunned into silence, I turned around, walking backwards. "What is _that_ supposed to mean!?"

He gave me an amused grin, walking around me to Helena waiting at the door to the next cart. They entered and I followed.

"Hey," I called. "Seriously!? What you don't think I've had boyfriends?!"

"Never said that."

"Well I've had _tons_! Well…not _tons_ but you know a decent amount. And damn straight I had sex with most of them! And fuck yes they said they enjoyed it! Well…I mean I did have sex with some but not all of them. I mean I didn't lose it until I was like nineteen, when I got into college. But…But that's beside the point! The point is you're saying that I've never had one! Or are you saying one couldn't handle me…? Because then I'm just confused on whether that's a compliment or an insult. But coming from you I'll take it as an insult! Caveman!"

Loud screams from somewhere far off stopped me in my tracks. I tried not to let it get to me but it did. My happy-go-lucky mood earlier that I'd developed while killing was gone completely. I raced to catch up to Leon and did what I recalled doing back on campus.

I took the back of his leather jacket in my hands and gripped it for dear life. Like it was the only thing that was keeping me sane anymore. Of course Leon noticed, and he looked back over his shoulder at me.

"You really like doing that," Helena stated from in front. So she'd seen too? Great.

"She did it back on the campus a few times," 'Caveman' said, amused.

We continued on in silence this way. Until I decided to finally speak.

I don't know why I told them. Really I don't. Maybe it had to do with feeling a bit more comfortable around them. Maybe it was because I was caught in a vulnerable state again. Or maybe it was because I just wanted to talk about him, the man that impacted me, that meant so much to me. The man that was now dead as a doornail.

"I used to do this to Uncle Adam," I muttered, but knew they could hear me. "When I was little, I wasn't very talkative and confident like I am now, not as brave. The fighting between my parents and the isolation I felt as a young child in grade school affected me greatly. I was so shy and so timid. Moving to D.C. was a big impact on me. I knew no one, unlike before when we'd lived in Tennessee in a small town where everyone knew everyone. D.C. was so big and intimidating to a small seven year old like me. My younger sisters didn't mind, only because I shielded them back in the hell, and made sure they were elsewhere when our parents fought.

I met Adam on a really cold day, when he came over to meet us for dinner. My mother pushed this, wanting us to get closer to any family or friends our new father had. So we felt more comfortable I guess. My sisters were quick to jump into action, all cute like and what not. But me…I stayed back, continued trying to put a puzzle together. I was wearing a Mickey Mouse shirt, which is where I got the nickname permanently; Uncle Adam gave it to me. After my sisters left, he came and helped me, since my siblings had abandoned me. He talked and talked. I never said a word. But I listened. When he left, I never said bye. This would go on for two maybe four days, I can't remember exactly, until I had to go to school.

It was really cold. I wasn't used to it at all. It got cold in Tennessee, yeah, but not snowy cold. My sisters were taken to their daycare and I was left to head to my grade school. Uncle Adam was the one who took me. He didn't have a problem with it; my parents were doing important stuff to insure our wellbeing there. My school was just a couple of streets down, luckily, and we walked. I started out walking a little behind him, but when the school came into view I found Uncle Adam's jacket, the back of it, and I wouldn't allow us to go closer.

So he devised a game. I hold on and we pretend like we were the only people there, flying in the air, and if I let go, Uncle Adam's flying ability would fade and we'd both fall into lava that surrounded us. I was really amused as a kid, had a big, wild imagination, so I played along, and suddenly we were in front of the school. After that, it became a game we'd play together whenever he took me to school and even when he was outside waiting for me to take me home. It was our little thing and I loved it. We still do it. I…I mean we used to. Whenever we met up when he wasn't too busy with President things, we'd go out for some coffee or in my case tea and then we'd walk back to the White House, with his security surrounding us of course. It drove them all crazy. Put the President's life in jeopardy, they said. Uncle Adam didn't mind. Not when it came to me.

So now…now I do it because it keeps me focused and calm. If it annoys you, I'll stop, Leon. Or at least try." I took a deep breath, slightly praying he'd be okay with it. I don't know why, but it really mattered to me what he thought.

_He probably thinks I'm stupid. Childish. A baby for holding onto something like that_, I thought bitterly, cursing myself for thinking otherwise.

"If it helps you, it's fine with me. It doesn't really bother me much."

My mouth fell open, shocked by his answer. And I only grew more shocked as he continued.

"I think it's great that you and Adam had that. That you two still found the time to do it even when he was the President. It's a very nice thing. My only regret is that you can't do it anymore with him." His voice grew low as he said the last part, a sadness dripping after every word.

My heart clenched and I allowed my body to act on its own free will. My legs stopped in place, my hands tugged hard on the jacket, causing Leon to stop and turn to me, curious. He seemed to freeze when he looked at me.

"It's okay." A small sad smile formed. "It's okay, Leon. It's not your fault. There was nothing else you could have done. Nothing anyone could have done." My throat constricted. "I…I forgive you. I forgave you a while back, when the car crashed and before I passed out. I forgave you every time you took my harsh words and snaps, every time I ignored you, every time I broke down. You never gave up on me. Neither of you. You never left me there, never spoke foul to me, took everything I threw at you. You did that…and I know it's not just because it was your job. Your job was to protect me and get me out, not put up with my shit and listen to it. So…thank you. Thank you very much." I licked my lips, and laughed nervously, rubbing the back of my head. "Um…can I hug you? I mean…is that weird? I don't know…I just…really want to hug you right now. You look like a sad little puppy left out in the rain for days without food. And that's cute, the puppy thing, but not okay. That's animal cruelty. And yeah…I'll just shut up now. Come here, Caveman. I'm serious. I really do think you need a hug."

I pulled him over to me, and wrapped my arms around his wide torso, giving him the hug he deserved, that he needed. And was happy when he reciprocated it. Glad he did actually, or it would have been just plan awkward.

"Yup…just hugging a guy in a subway cart surrounded by dead bystanders in the middle of a zombie apocalypse. Nothing weird at all about that. Nothing at all," I commented.

"What is this, a love fest? Don't really have time for it guys," I heard Helena comment down the way, and I jumped. I'd completely forgotten about her.

Peeling ourselves away, I offered the male agent a grin, and hell even threw in a wink.

He simply chuckled and resumed out previous positions.

"Leon…I'm really not a whore, okay?"

"Don't worry, Nicole. You don't seem the type."

"Oh good. Wait…WHAT TYPE AM I!?"

I noticed something had changed in Leon. He was walking lighter. Like a huge weight on his shoulders had been removed finally. And I was thankful for that. Very thankful.

* * *

"A subway terminal!" My eyes sparkled, and I raced down the platform, as giddy as a school girl. I scanned for something, and when I found it, I squealed. "The exit! This is the exit guys!" I jumped up and down, pointing with both hands at the metal gate.

"Well would you look at that," Leon said, walking over to a button that I imagined would raise the gate. He pushed it and we waited.

Banging on the gate made us all jump back, our guns whipped out in a split second. Banging behind us made us turn as well. A woman, stuck in the subway cart, pleaded for us to help her get out, and calling some guy's name. Leon and Helena helped pry open the doors far enough to get her out, and the crazy woman made a beeline for the button.

I raced to stop her, but it was too late, the gate was rising and the woman was being grabbed by the undead behind it, and then being eaten. My heart flat lined, but I turned and jumped behind a couple of crates, taking aim and shooting. Leon and Helena backed up further, pulling their trigger relentlessly.

Strangely, these zombies seemed to be spitting an acidic substance from their mouths, much different from the zombies we'd encountered earlier. I smelt disaster, and made to stop all of it in its tracks.

Since I was so close to the door, the zombies had no trouble coming closer and closer, as much as we tried to force them back. Helena shouted warnings but I paid them no heed, my eyes set on an opening which I found with little problem. I jumped over the crates, and slid perfectly into the fray and out of it, feeling my back hit the stairs painfully. I flinched but wasted no time crawling up them halfway and taking the zombies down, making them fall.

When I reached into my boot to get my pocketknife, so I could knife them while they were down, I remembered how I'd had it out in the car, and how I'd left it there unknowingly. I cursed and then recalled something.

"Leon! Throw me your knife!" That might have been asking for a lot but I counted my blessing.

He seemed to want to protest, but then his eyes grew wide and he pulled it out, under hand tossing it my way.

I caught it with no trouble, patting myself on the back. And turned a little.

Acid grazed my legs, and I gasped. My legs gave out and I fell forward into the remaining zombies, and then was surrounded. Grabbing the knife, taking hold of my gun, I shot and stabbed the group, as they tried to attack me.

A shot to the head, knife to the head, shot to the shoulder, knife to the leg. Round and round until Leon and Helena backed me up and they were all dead, and I was out of ammo. I let out a sigh of relief, and stood with Helena's help as she snapped at me for my crazy stunt. I brushed it off, glancing at Leon and smiling.

"Don't say that that was fun," He snapped, eyes narrowed. "And no, that's definitely not happening again, so forget it."

I pouted. Ouch. I wasn't even going to say that! "So mean. But whatever. See if I hug _you _again, Caveman."

Let's just say he wasn't amused at all. But there was a flicker of something in his eyes. Amusement? Humor? Fascination? Eh…who knows? It's Leon.

Up the stairs and through the subway exit we went. Leon and Helena listening to Hunnigan speak, while I kicked some crates open and found some handgun ammo. I replenished my clip and then looked up to my companions as their conversation with the woman ended. Their expressions were borderline grim. "What? What'd she say? Is everything alright?"

Leon and Helena shook their heads together.

"Not good out there," Helena said, beginning to walk towards another flight of stairs. We followed.

"Not good? What do you mean _not good_?" I asked as soon as the outside was visible.

A fireman came out of nowhere, wielding an ax like a mad man. Leon pulled me back before he could harm me, and I answered the man's battle cry with a combat knife to the face, shutting him up for good. Turning, I offered the agent back his knife, now blood coated. He took it, putting it back into its sheath and then pushed me behind him, taking the first official step outside.

It sure looked like hell.

Actually, I think hell was kind of an understatement.

* * *

We soon discovered it was more chaotic out here then it had been all the other places we'd been. Cars were on fire, zombies were snacking on dead people—at least I convinced myself they were totally dead and not alive, for my sanities sake—hordes and hordes of zombies running amuck, not even joking. Leon and Helena made sure I stayed behind them at all cost, their eyes casting over their shoulders to check up on my stunned ass.

"Up the ladder," Leon ordered, and I wasted no time doing so. Once up, I climbed the metal before reaching a break in the platforms. I gasped, turning to look at my companions with wide, fearful eyes. Down below, in the darkness of the gap, zombies waited, moaning loudly, shuffling together.

"I'll go first," Helena said, guiding me away from the edge to take her spot. Didn't protest. Nope. Not at all.

Helena took a couple steps back before launching herself over, successfully making it. She turned, pulling out her gun, ready to give us back up when we crossed.

I stepped back, legs quaking.

"Nicole…?"

"I'm about done with this. All of this." My head was hurting, flashes of everything running through it, the concussion still there. "I feel like it's not going to end. Ever." My eyes met his, seeing his expression, and then laughing softly at myself. "Sorry…bit emotional lately. One minute I'm all hunky-dory and caring. The next I'm utterly depressed. I'm not _usually_ like this."

The male agent shook his head. "I don't hold it against you, Nicole. This wasn't supposed to happen. You've never been in this kind of stuff before, so it's only natural for you to act like this." He smiled softly. "If you didn't, I'd be worried."

Translation: if you weren't, I'd consider you psycho and have to put you down or something.

"You can go first, and I can make sure you get across, back you up. Or we can do it the other way around. Either way you're getting across, I'll make sure of it." Leon's voice was full of emotion and resolved, hard and set on the goal to help me. I'm not going to lie, my heart skipped a beat. Maybe several beats.

He made me feel better. Warmth spread from my toes quickly, crawling up my body, taking me over. How? How was this even possible? How could this man do this to me? Looking at him now, I thought of how foreign it all was, the feelings and thoughts he conjured up. The way he made me stutter over my words, made me frustrated but thrilled the next, able to bring me up to spirits in moments such as this with just a few words. He was a strange man, but I couldn't help but feel utterly fascinated by him. I wondered if I would have been just as fascinated if we'd met in different circumstances, if my Uncle had introduced us, or we'd simply ran into one another in some store or café, unknowingly linked, him being the best friend of Adam, and also working under him, for him.

I realized I'd been staring at him for way to long and looked away, face hot yet again. "I-I'll go first. I can do this," I answered. I turned, giving Helena, who had been waiting patiently, a nod. I mirrored her previous actions, backing up, mustering up courage and then running, pushing myself off the metal with the front of my foot. I was relieved when I'd made it safely, smiling widely and full of cheerfulness. I'd done it! I'd really done it!

Moving back a little, we waited for Leon to join us. My eyes watched him carefully. He did the same we'd done, came flying through the air, and landed perfectly. I was about to praise him, offer him a high five or something.

We weren't ready for what happened next. We weren't ready for a zombie to get a hand on his leg and pull it out from under him, causing him to fall.

Leon let out grunt.

I was there in an instant. Not sure how I'd done it, not sure where I'd gotten such speed, where I'd called it from. My hands gripped his wrist, and I whimpered, much to my surprise. With all my strength, I began to pull the agent up. Helena was shooting the zombies trying to get him. It took only a few seconds for her to finally shoot off the undead that was still holding onto Leon's leg for dear life, but I made sure I was damn well ready to help him up faster than ever before.

Half his torso was up now, and I had to move back to give him room, so the rest could follow. My hands went from his wrist to his right arm, grip white-knuckled, though it didn't seem to faze him. I pulled him away from the edge, but didn't allow myself to breathe yet. I was now holding his shoulders, looking him over, and then peering around behind him to look at his legs. Later, I'd laugh at myself and say, 'since when was I a Leon', or something, but that didn't matter. Nothing mattered. Nothing.

How had it come to this? How had it come to me worrying to death about him? Where? How? I'd been asking myself the same questions for hours, I knew that, but still I questioned and questioned. They just came and came, not stopping, not giving me a break, not giving my _brain _a break. Was this okay? Was it okay for me to freak out about this, like this? Was it okay for all these emotions to come so suddenly, so rapidly? Did they even make sense? I'd went from hate, to anger, to grief, to sadness, to guilt, to sorrow, to happy, to invigorated. And this man brought it all up. Every one, every piece, everything. All the emotions, all the memories.

Was it just him? What about Helena? What if she'd been the one almost pulled into a zombie orgy—I mean zombie nest? What if she'd been the one, not Leon? Would I have still cared? Would I have still jumped to save her? Well yeah, I would have, but would it have the same effect on me? Would I feel like this?

I wanted to cry. Oh god, I wanted to cry so much. He could have almost died, and it felt so wrong. He didn't deserve to. He didn't have to. He was so good, so pure, so nice and sweet. If anyone should die it should be me. I was mean. I was hateful. I was angry and prideful and scornful, and I should be the one who should die. Would that have been okay? Would it have mattered to them?

Suddenly I was thinking about my past, more importantly my last boyfriend. He'd been my best friend for two years, and we'd gotten together two months after I'd turned twenty. Our relationship had lasted for year and a half, and then he'd broken up with me, moved away, transferred colleges immediately and started dating another girl within the week. I'd been so devastated, so heartbroken. I'd sat in my room for days, watching stupid sad love story movies in which the main male character had to leave his love interest for her own wellbeing, eating chocolate and drinking chocolate milk, the typical girl thing to do. I'd felt sorry for myself. I'd been a total wreck, and it took Zoe's encouragement and friendship to pull me out of it. Her and Uncle Adam. I never told my parents about it, I hadn't wanted them to get upset, or think ill of me, although I was sure they wouldn't have, I still didn't want it.

I remembered wondering for the next months if I mattered to him. If I'd died right then and there would he have cared? I continued on this pity party, until finally I woke up one day, slapped myself good, and made to get over it. There was no point in doing so anymore; it was over and done with. And honestly, I wasn't exactly sad per say that our relationship had ended, the romantic side actually. I was sad that we no longer talked. We'd been best friends before that, knew each other well, and that's what mattered to me in the end. Now, I just wanted the friendship back, to have him back in my life and for us to be friends again. He hadn't changed his number, I was sure of that, but I never tried to call him, and he never tried to call me.

Maybe I'd try to after all this. Maybe just maybe.

"Nicole? Nicole let go. I'm okay. Nicole? Nicole answer me! Nicole!"

I shook myself back into reality. "I…I'm sorry. I…" My voice trailed off. Then suddenly, my real self snapped back. I looked at Leon sharply, pointing at him. "You! You be careful next time! Okay? You scared me half to death!" My index finger poked him in the middle of his chest. "Promise me! Promise me you'll be more careful next time! Both of you!" My eyes went to Helena.

The woman raised her arms in defense, a smirk on her face. "I didn't do _anything_," She told me.

I opened my mouth to retaliate, but Leon cut me off.

"Promise."

I rounded back to him, and gulped.

He had that serious expression on his face, but you could tell there were edges of sweet niceness just oozing out. My heart did that whole skip-a-beat thing again. Pursing my lips, I casted my eyes down, suddenly extremely interested in the zombies, being able to make them out through the holes in the platform.

"Yeah…that's right. Better."

I didn't sound like myself at all.

I wasn't sure if I should think it weird or not anymore. It was happening way too often. Would be best if I just let it go.

Pft. Easier said than done.


End file.
